warmth {complete}

31||i love everything that you've got, boy, tell me will you be mine?

Griffin is throwing rocks at my window.

Actual rocks. I've never had rocks thrown at my window, and it's only a little exhilarating. The rest of me wants to lean out of the window and scream at Griffin to stop being so loud. I opt for an in-between of sorts and lift my window open angrily.

"What?" I hiss, bending at the waist to be able to see him.

"Hi!" he yells, waving wildly. "Can I come up?"

"If you're quiet," I reply, leaning back into my room and crossing my arms. He struggles up the side of my house but makes it miraculously inside.

"Hey," he breathes, taking my face in his hands and kissing me hard. I smile against his lips because he threw actual rocks at my window, and he slides his hands over my sides. We're breathing heavily by the time he breaks the kiss, and my chest heaves against his. He rests his forehead against mine and smiles. "So what's up?"

"Nothing," I reply, pulling him to my bed and curling into his side. "What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk," he whispers, touching my waist and lowering his head to my shoulder.

"Uh oh."

"We'll be fine," he assures me, kissing my cheek quickly and pulling my back to his chest. I'm a little stiff in his arms, because I wasn't expecting him and I'm not wearing a bra, but he doesn't notice. "I just want to talk about college."

"We'll be fine for that, too," I tell him, smoothing my hand against his cheek and kissing him softly. "Griffin, I know how you feel about long-distance relationships, but we'll be fine."

"I've done this before," he murmurs, stroking my cheek in a memorize-y way. "It doesn't end well. It never ends well. If we're gonna end, Katherine, I want it to be well."

"But I don't want to end," I reply, twisting in his arms so I'm facing him. His eyes soften and he kisses me again.

"I know. But long-distance is hard. I don't want to lose you at all, but if I'm going to, I want it to be for a reason better than infidelity or distrust." He hugs me hard enough that he can undoubtedly feel my braless chest, but he doesn't say anything, just holds me tighter. "I just want you to come to Emerson with me, Katherine."

"I want you to come to Yale with me," I murmur into his neck, feeling tears burn my eyes. I really don't want to lose him. "Or I want you to stop being stubborn and let us do long-distance."

"Phone calls aren't the same," he says, running his hands through my hair and kissing my cheekbone. "My old girlfriend—Georgia—from when I lived in New York, she and I tried it when I moved to Virginia. I cheated on her with some girl in my art class, and she cheated on me with a boy she worked with. I don't want that to be us, Katherine. I didn't love her like I love you. If we lost each other that way, it would break me."

"I'm not gonna cheat on you, Griffin!" I exclaim, clenching my jaw. "Don't you trust me?"

"That is why long-distance never works. Maybe you won't cheat on me, Katherine, but at some point or another, I'll get it in my head that you're cheating on me. I'll confront you, you'll accuse me of not trusting you, I'll insist I trust you, but I won't. I know how this will play out. I'd rather break up in the private of your bedroom than over the phone."

"I'd rather not break up at all."

He presses his lips to my hair and closes his eyes, pulling me even closer. "Maybe we could make it. I just don't want to— "

"Lose me, I know," I whisper, turning my head and resting my forehead in the dent at the base of his throat. "I don't want to lose you, either. And we don't have to. I don't understand why you're being so insistent on this, Griffin. Did you love Georgia?"

His brows furrow. "No."

"And do you love me?"

"Yes," and he kisses me, just to prove his point.

"Then you don't really know what a long-distance relationship of this sort would be like, do you?" I run my fingertips over his cheek and press my lips to his neck. "Listen, if we do break up—and I really don't think we will—I promise it won't be over the phone. I'll visit you or you'll visit me. I won't end it so easily, okay? I love you too much for that."

His eyes are melting now, searching my face for truth and tearing into me. He must decide I'm being earnest, because he brings his lips to mine and kisses me sweetly. His hand slides under my shirt and I slap him away because of the lack of bra. He grins against my lips and clutches me to his chest, kissing me hard enough that I should be concerned with my breathing.

But I'm not, because he's still mine, and I wouldn't break this kiss for something as silly as breathing. 

A/N: this was also short but it was more relevant so it's okay. i found a song of halsey's that i hadn't heard yet, and i'm so excited about life now. darling, what's it coming to?/and have you got a lighter on you?/been trying to put these down for ages now/but i can't seem to come through/he said i really don't mind if we take our time/'cause i've got a couple bottles of your favorite wine/and i've got you/yeah, i've got you now/i've got you

thank you for reading.