Anything but This |C.R

10

Laying in the yard just sets off my emotions. I can't help the tears that stream out of my eyes. I see the next I sent him over and over. I can't even imagine how many texts I have or missed calls. The crying voice mails that I will never listen to.
This is just so selfish of me. I am ruining him. All because I don't want to live here.
I lay on my back watching the starts and hear a bang on the fence.
And another bang.
I look up and see hands over the top of it then I see a head and a leg.
The figure climbs over the fence and walks with their head down.
It's Chandler.
"No. Please Chandler. Go home" I cry standing up walking over to
Him.
He shakes his head and plants his lips onto mine.
Holding the small of my back he pulls us closer. Melting us together.
But I can't do this.
I pull away from the heat and look down.
"Chandler please. Leave." I say solemnly
"Sydney. Why do you think I will never stop looking for you. You say not to search but one looks for the things that they love. They never stop." His eyes are filled with pain.
"Chandler. Do you know the saying? 'If you love something. Then set it free.' Please. I need to leave. And you can not follow me Chandler. I need to start a new life. You do also. I can't stay here. If I do, I will die here. Then you will never see me again. You may visit my grave everyday of my life but that won't make me come back. This gives us a second chance. A new start. I suggest you take it." I sigh with the end of my babbling.
"You can't just leave" he says retaliating me
"My dad is gone. My aunt is the only other family member. Tell your mother I love her. But she must be worried about you now." I say holding his cheek.
He leans on my hand and holds it ever so swiftly.
"Every time I close my eyes I see the first time we kissed."-"Chandler stop"-"no. I can't live without you"
His voice cracks. I am getting furious.
"you're just going to have to find a way. This isn't any easier for me. You will never understand the pain I am in. Trust me. I am hurting. More than you are. Every fucking person I have loved has been ripped out of my life. You and my aunt are the only people I have left. And I don't want to ruin you. So yes. I must leave. And you should also." My words leave my tongue like venom. They leap off my lips and I am unable to call them back. They are bullets to his heart. But it will speed the healing process.
"Can't I just have one more night with you?" He says quietly. Never losing our eye contact.
I blink away a tear a nod my head.
His arms engulf me and we sit on the grass. Holding each other. Never wanting to be torn apart.

Okay. So the chapters might be shorter for a little while. To lure you guys into the story wanting more. Tell your Chandler loving pals about this and always. Happy 420
-Isabelle