One Page.

There

There used to be a time when I didn't live here. I wasn't accustomed to the modern antics. I didn't know what it was like to be anywhere else but There. There was a place of peace, magic and wonder. It was my own. Created from the very essence of my most innocent thoughts. Despite what life I had already lived. Nothing else was real but There.

I knew where to find the key to enter such serenity. I would travel every single day to get it. Every chance I got I'd run to the door, open it, and once again begin my adventures. The people were always different yet the same. No one spoke to me but I didn't mind. I was happy to even be allowed to observe them. Where they went I followed taking in every single word as if they were drops of water and I a dry dessert.

I will admit that that dedication or "obsession", as my family called it, drove me mad at times. I preferred a feast of words as opposed to my mother's cooking. I didn't want to learn about math or science. I wanted to learn how this new adventure would end. I didn't want to play with "real" friends. All the friends I needed where There, even if they didn't speak to me. I didn't want to sleep. I wanted to stay awake through the late hours of the night wondering around. Sometimes I got lost. So lost I didn't notice the sun beginning to peek through the skies edge. Those were the days.

I've tried to go back now that I'm older. Unfortunately I've been away for so long that I fear it's been too long. I go back looking for the key and I find it. Everything looks the same, the key, the door, and the people. But nothing feels the same. When I walk through the door no one notices me and I feel a strange sense of solitude. I can hear everyone talking but the words don't sink in. I want to take them in as if they were water droplets but I feel like an over flowing ocean. I have to run away in frustration.

What's changed is simply my view. Their voices clash with the voices already installed in my mind. What used to entertain me seems to not phase me. Wonder no longer takes me into its sweet embrace as I make my way through the crowd. Instead it walks by my side every once in a while brushing my shoulder but nothing further. When she strays from my side there seems no way to pull her back. She leaves me.

Reluctantly I close the book. There is nothing for me There anymore. I understand far too much of reality to allow myself to get lost in fantasy. Life has injected its logical poison into me like a relentless vampire, burning away any sense of irrationality. My mind's shifted like a werewolf in a full moon. Except my moon is always full. I'm locked in this dungeon guarded by the Dragon of Life. There is no escaping. I've lost my sense of freedom.