Heir and Pride

Chapter Thirty Eight

Dragon Island seemed much more homely once they returned and Hiccup was desperate to rest in his little nest. Astrid had insisted on feeding him some very badly cooked fish stew and dry bread before he was allowed to rest and he had given up resisting her determination: he knew she wouldn't hurt him but he also knew she wouldn't take no for an answer either. She had insisted on seeing his leg and gently rubbing in the ointments, her hands surprisingly gentle. She had ensured that there was a good fire in the chamber they slept in and Hiccup had felt Toothless curl around his skinny and battered shape.

"Will you be alright?" Astrid asked him gently, tucking the fur around him. He stared up at her: after a return home, Astrid seemed safe. His green eyes blinked and he managed a very small smile.

"No, I'm good," he said sleepily. "A-Astrid...thanks for rescuing me..." She sat back.

"I was really worried," she admitted quietly. "Especially after Fishlegs told me you were desperate." He closed his eyes.

"If I couldn't be with Toothless, I didn't want to live," he admitted, "because Dad would never let me go. I would be his prisoner until he decided I failed him..." He curled up tighter. "I-I'm sorry. I put you in danger..." She sighed and poked the fire.

"Get some sleep, Hiccup," she said quietly. "You're safe here." He gave a small smile and extended his arm to rest his hand against the warm black scales of the Night Fury.

"Don't leave me," he pleaded quietly and she smiled.

"I'm not going anywhere," she told him softly as he drifted off the sleep. "I've got nowhere else to go," she added desolately.

The scream woke her in the middle of the night, the desperate howl of Hiccup echoing through the gloomy chamber. She started up, her hand automatically reaching for her axe but her eyes adjusted to the reddish light of the dying fire and saw the boy bolt upright, his bruised face twisted in terror and arms waving to ward off the unseen shade of his father, closing in to take something even more from the trapped boy. He was pressed back against Toothless, who was looking at him with sad, green eyes and rumbling and warbling gently to try to reassure him. Tears were streaming down Hiccup's face from his unseeing green eyes and he was trembling from head to toe.

Astrid rose slowly, her eyes meeting those of the Night Fury. She didn't want to alarm or upset Toothless, who was extremely protective of his rider but the dragon gave a gentle croon that invited her close and she slowly crawled to his side.

"Hiccup?" she asked hoarsely.

"No, no, no, no, no..." he whimpered. "I won't. I WON'T!" He shook his head.

"It's okay-you're safe now," she tried. He waved his arms frantically, trying to ward her away.

"I-I c-can't..." he begged. "Dad-p-please...I can't live without Toothless...I c-can't be the Heir you w-want...I can't be a puppet...I have to fly..."

"Hiccup-you're safe..." Astrid called, increasingly worried.

"Please-kill me!" he sobbed. "Just k-kill me-if I can't fly, I don't wanna live..."

So she crawled forward and wrapped her arms around him. He stiffened for a long moment, then clung to her like a limpet. His head buried in her neck, his arms were vice-like round her body and he just sobbed. Quietly, she wrapped her arms around him and as he snuggled against her...and then she realised that he probably hadn't been hugged, properly hugged for years. His father had probably not hugged him since he was a small boy and his mother had died when he was a baby. Gobber wasn't the hugging type and there was no one else. So she hugged him fiercely until he relaxed and she was able to lay him down on his furs, wrap them tightly around him and relax. She looked up at Toothless.