Shot In The Dark.

500 Days. (One-shot)

Time and time before, I've been told that happiness shouldn't depend on something, someone, you might lose.

I listened. And I thought I understood. 

It was simple, really. I told myself to never get attached to anyone. That to love was to be weak. In order to be happy, I had to be free.

And so I lived my life alone and content, happy to be with myself - the only person I knew I would ever need. The loneliness was comforting, because I didn't know what I was missing. That was until I met you.

It was raining that night, and I was stuck in a cramped coffee shop, trying to finish an English paper due the next day.

It was exactly 8:47 when you walked in, pushing forth the door, a strong gust of wind signalling that someone walked in the shop.

I looked up, frustrated and slightly shivering at the freezing cold air.

And, lo and behold, there you were. Your frizzy red hair was sticking to your face, the green coat that brought out the color of your eyes wet and clinging to your small frame. 

Maybe it was the way your nose scrunched up in frustration as you noted the jam-packed place or how you chewed your bottom lip because you were feeling claustrophobic.

I know it was something, just something, about you, that made me think oh, shit.

Love at first sight is stupid. It's the only thing next to actual love that I believe is downright outrageous. Lies, bullcrap. 

But the way you walked up to the counter to order a caramel frappe, brushing your hair back as you smiled meekly at the guy behind the counter, made me rethink everything I ever believed in.

And I guess now all I can think is, that's what love does. It makes you question everything you've ever known, it makes you want to change yourself for someone - even someone you barely know.

Now, all I can think is that I shouldn't have let myself fall. 

As you looked around for an empty chair, daintily you sipped on the straw of your drink. There went your nose scrunching, and then your eyes lit up as I gave you a small smile and edged myself to give you more space on the couch I occupied. 

When I look back to that day, I don't know if I should have done that, or if I would be better off if I didn't.

I did, anyway.

You walked to where I sat, took one last searching look around the room and then oh so carefully lowered yourself beside me. Once you were comfortable, you looked sideways at me, offering a smile. 

And oh, god, when you smiled. When you smile. It was something else entirely, something so uniquely you. The left side of your mouth quirked up and your eyes would crinkle at the sides and you would never notice but your eyebrows would always shoot up.

I gave you the usual guy nod then, trying but evidently failing to look cool - impress you, actually. I caught you rolling your eyes as you looked away, but you were smirking anyway.

Then you pulled out an iPod, fidgeted with it a little and soon you were lost in your own world. While I was lost in you.

You were listening to The Smith's as they crooned about heavenly ways to die, and then I couldn't help but grin a little at your wonderful taste in music.

You caught me staring, and it was awkward at best, but you were always one to play it cool and I was always the stuttering one - and I guess that's why things turned out the way they did.

That day, we went our separate ways. But not before I learned your name was Natalie and I introduced myself as Kyle, and not before we planned to meet a day later, in the same coffee shop.

I was taken aback, but a little amused, when before you left and after we settled our "date", you told me with a smirk that we were only going as friends.

Well, what did you expect? What did I expect?

I think you knew I would fall in love. I was not so fortunate. 

I didn't know you would leave, because if I did, I would never have trusted you with so much.

It was the best and worst few months of my life.

I loved you, really. Me, the guy who never loved. I was the guy who didn't believe in love, but you came in to my life and ruined everything. 

And then you left. Of course you left. And with you, you took all that was there of me. You took my last belief in love, my heart and dammit, my happiness as well. 

Now, all that's left are these words, but they're rendered meaningless, because you're not here and you're not listening and well, you never listened in the first place.

I was stupid, stupid, stupid enough to believe in love and to believe in you. I thought I knew what they all meant when they said the things they said. I didn't though.

So here I am and there you go, me and my everything gone with you.

I'm trying to believe that there's something better. I really am.

But that's just what love does to you; it strips you of all your beliefs and everything that you once were, leaving you to pick up the pieces for yourself, hoping - and oh you can only ever hope - that someone out there decides to scavenge along with you and put you back together.

Not you, Natalie. It just wasn't you.

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Author's Note: I have no idea what I just wrote. Inspired from that song 500 Days by AJ Rafael about that movie 500 Days of Summer. yay.