Goals

"We go way back."

When I was in eighth grade, the most beautiful girl in the universe sat next to me in math class. She had moved to Diamond Bar all the way from New Jersey, something the teacher had announced upon introducing her to the class. I remember thinking this was amazing; she was practically from a completely different world. She smiled to the whole room, and I couldn't help but smile back like an idiot. I almost started hyperventilating when she was assigned the empty seat next to me.

"What's your name?"

I forget how to speak for a second. "I'm Alex. Morgan. Alex Morgan."

She ignores how much I'm stuttering and laughs. "Nice to meet you, Lex. I'm sorry we have to meet under such unfortunate circumstances."

I raised my eyebrows, confused. "What do you mean?"

The girl leans back in her chair and gestures at the room around us. "Math class. The place where dreams of educational success die."

Despite having such a morbid outlook on the class, Tobin was actually really great at solving equations. She never volunteered to answer any questions, but she would help me whenever I asked. I never needed the help, but I got a weird feeling in my stomach whenever I could gain Tobin's attention that kept me pretending I was clueless. She made the class something I could look forward to every day. I found my crush on her growing rapidly, and I didn't know how to stop it.

* * *

Kelly O'Hara was never supposed to know who I had a crush on. She had been my best friend ever since we were assigned to the same club soccer team in third grade, but the idea of telling her scared me. I didn't know her opinions on gay people, and I didn't know what I'd do if they were negative. I worried about her telling everybody, because, while she was amazing and nice, she talked to anybody about anything. I didn't want to lose my best friend over something that wasn't my fault, something that I couldn't control. Luckily, Kelly couldn't care less that I liked Tobin.

"Who do you have a crush on, Alex?"

I choke on the water I was drinking, surprised at how off topic her question is. "What?"

"Who do you have a crush on? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but I've been curious lately."

I say the first thing that comes to mind. My first instinct. "I don't have a crush on anybody."

"It's Tobin, isn't it?"

I choke on my water again. "No, no, it's definitely not Tobin."

She looks at me for a moment and smiles before coming to sit on my side of the lunch table. She hugs me, and I feel like I can suddenly breathe easier than I could before. "It's okay, dork. I see the way you turn away from her in the locker room."

I laugh and shake my head, trying to loosen myself up. I start messing with my fingers. "It would be disrespectful to stare."

My voice is too small, and she knows it. "Hey, Alex, it's okay. I don't care at all."

She squeezes me even more tightly, and I let out a relaxed smile. "I was so afraid you would judge me."

"I could never judge my best friend."