It was me, not you

Chapter 11

*BUZZ* my phone goes. Andi looks down at it (my other friend). 

"Aren't you going to answer it?" she asks. I look at it and then put my phone away.

"No" I shake my head. "It's nothing."

"Sam? Your avoiding him. You've avoided him since the wedding" she says as I roll my eyes.

"No" I say trying to convince myself I wasn't avoiding him.

"Your phone has gone off six times since you've been here. Your avoiding him."

"Fine. I am." I finally admit. "We had... sex at the wedding."

"But that was a week ago" Andi says.

I nod. "Yeah."

"You've avoided him for a week?" she asks confused.

"Yeah. He was pretty drunk so I am hoping he didn't remember it happened. But I showed him something and I am just hoping he didn't remember. I don't want to know if he remember or not, so before he woke up I got dressed and walked out."

"Oh. I'm sorry. If it make you feel better. I would do the same. But maybe talk to him. He deserves the truth and you deserve to know what he wants."

"Fine. I'll do it after rehearsal today. We're figuring out a new number. We won regionals. I want the routine to be amazing even better than regionals and Quinn won't be dancing because of the baby so. I need to sort that at. Thanks Andi" I say. She nods and smiles.

"No worries. I've got to go to work so I call you later. Oh before I forget are you going to the reunion of school. I think I might go. It seems kind of cool." she say.

"Maybe" I say and walk out of her room.

---

I walk in and see them all stretching. I drop my bag and walk into the centre. "Because we won, we need to be 100 time better. So I have come up with an idea for our routine. Its a little older audience themed but it should be a lot of fun and its a new type of dance I would like to get into it. We do a bit now but not a lot. The song you will be going is Cell Block Tango- from Chicago."

"I love that musical" Maddie says excited. I smile at how excited she was. 

"So we are going to have 4 main girls tell the stories and there's going to be bars and the boys are the girls and boys are going to be tell the story. It's hard to explain but we can get it. And when we do its going to look great."

---

After everyone leaves I stand around and look at the walls. I see the speakers so I but on a random song, Michael Bublé's  Feeling Good. It starts and I just free style- do whatever fits the words. I was dancing to get everything out of my mind- the scratch on my back my fainted bruises and just Sam in general. I really wanted to get all that shit out of my head. It gets to the sassy bit and that's were I get all my anger and frustration out; but as I do Sam walks in. I stop dancing as the song continues to play. 

"What are you doing here?" I say breathing deeply.

"We need to talk" he says. I put my hands on my hips in an attempt to catch my breath.

"There's noting to talk about" I say and grab my drink bottle. 

"I wasn't that drunk" he says. I was confused on what he meant, but it was also almost as if I knew what he meant.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"The night. The wedding. I wasn't that drunk. I remember our conversation and what happened after that"

"Nothing happened" I say shrugging. I was surprised he remember and that was why he kept calling me all this time.

"Yes something did happen" he says stepping towards me. I step back and look at him.

"No" I say.

"I still love you" he says walking up to my face and kissing me. I pull away.

"First of all you can't just walk up to me and kiss me" I say. "And if you really want me to be straight with you, you can't do that. If you don't kiss me. I will be honest with you" I say. He steps back. 

"Why were there scratches and bruises on your body?" he asks. I look down at the ground and take a breath. 

"There was this guy. Before I came here. He raped me while I was there and came back at my sisters wedding and raped me again. That's how me and Stefan broke up, and that same guy came to my comp a week ago and tried to again." I say and sit down near the mirror he walks to me and sits down next to me. "I wanted to be honest with you. I have hurt so many people. I don't want to hurt you."

"Your not going to" he says wrapping his arms around me. I bow my head into his shoulder and tears fall.

"I'm sorry" he says. "I was insensitive." I look up at him and see him looking down on me. I finally realize what is happening.  I get up and look at him.

"I can't" I say shaking my head. I grab my bag and run out. I couldn't. I was still made at him for the whole sleeping with my enemy thing but I didn't want to see him after what I told him. It haunted me everyday, it almost became something I had to tell someone or  some way they would find out. I was sick of it. It hurt to think about it. I just wanted to let it go.