Flipped: Back Again (L.T. Sequel to Flipped)

Chapter 22: Guards Up

So.. This was her guest. Of all the people to invite in the whole country of fucking England, he had to be the son of a bitch she called. I much rather come in contact with her possessive driver; or even the husband so I could have a word regarding their home life. But him? Now I know she's playing games. Could she really have been that offended from what I said earlier? Her staid countenance gave me the impression she was fine. A little attitude was thrown but for the most part she was calm, collected. If I had a bloody car, I'd grab my keys and leave. But I can't... She's trapped me here. I momentarily contemplate if she planned this from the start.

"So.. Are we just goin' to stand by the door, or can I have a seat?" Gabriel quizzes, redirecting himself to Eliza. She twists on her heel, gesturing him to follow her to the living area. He makes no effort to hide his lustful gaze, eyes stripping her body of the already revealing dress she's wearing. It's sick; especially how the creep winks at me afterwards. He's still the same pig from years ago. I can see clearly nothing has changed. He still has that same cocky aura about him and that mop head of his has turned into an all-out greasy mane. It's disgusting; he needs to get a damn haircut already!

"I can feel your eyes burning into my head, Lou. Someone must still be holding a grudge." He snickers, relaxing back on the couch, his crooked smile apparent and taunting. He's baiting me, I know it.

"No. Just turned off by the amount of oil slicked in your hair. It's called shampoo, mate. Get some." I wink.

"Ladies don't seem to have a problem with it. Right Eliza?"

Both of our eyes dart her way. I'm sending mental messages to her, demanding she say otherwise and side with me. She doesn't look too compliant as she pretends to really ponder the question. Eliza cocks her head to the side, teasing us both as she plays with her gown and reveals a little skin here and there. "It doesn't really do much for me." She finally says, and I shoot Gabriel a victorious grin.

"However," she starts back up, "I see you've been working out more. And that.." Eliza lingers behind him, walking her hand down his chest. "Is something I do quite fancy." She coos in his ear, mischievous eyes flickering up at me to make sure I'm watching. I was right; she's toying with me, maybe even trying to "teach me a lesson" perhaps. I thought we were done with these petty games. Her childish antics shouldn't be affecting me this much but I can't help the rise of jealousy that comes with watching them interact. My mind took me back ten years ago. I tried to exhume the crude memories forcing their way back to relevance, but it became increasingly harder as she continued to stroke his arm and play hostess. The scarring thoughts of before were slowing peeling back open.

These two extremes in my life were never supposed to unite. The girl whom I so passionately fell in love with and the guy I hated beyond comprehension being together created that pit of darkness that ailed my being for over half a decade. It's what drove me to commit so many licentious acts with women. I didn't trust them anymore; I felt incapable of really understanding love from that point. And consumed in all my self-loathing, I disregarded Eleanor's feelings time and time again to satisfy my demons. My El wouldn't dream of doing anything so heinous; yet here I am about to pounce on this man for a girl that doesn't even belong to me. Or ever really has.

I'm stuck in this moral loop again. What the hell am I even doing here in the first place? Why'd I think this was ever a good idea! I knew anything involving Eliza would eventually lead to my own destruction and I was simple enough to not give a damn and stride on anyway. I'm so desperately grasping for what could've been that I'm neglecting the most stable thing I've ever had in my life. I can't deny my affection for Eliza, convinced it may lay forever in my conscious, however, my happiness with el is no illusion either. Both of these women have a keen role and I care for them both. But, it's obvious which one actually reciprocates and respects those feelings. And it sure as hell isn't Eliza.