Still Trying [phan/boyxboy]

doce | xii

song: little do you know by alex and sierra.
p.s.: please give me thoughts on this new writing style!

Phil was wide awake.

Although the clock in the corner of his room has dinged 12 times, he was still unable to sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, he couldn't find peace, no sense of relief from his tired state.

The room was eerily quiet. If it wasn't for the small light on his bedside table, he wouldn't be able to see his own fingers. This is how Phil's room has always been, but it felt different. 

He had been so accustomed of gaming sounds from the living room. He had been accustomed of the sound of footsteps in the bedroom beside him. These facts might seem to be very unimportant, but to Phil, it makes a huge difference.

He had been accustomed to Dan. No wonder he was awake, really- all the thoughts kept him away from slumber.

Isn't it stupid? Why would he care?

No, really. I know this is a fanfiction- no wait, a phanfiction, damn these puns- but isn't it a bit irrational to care for someone that much when you met them just a month ago?

‎Frankly, Phil asks himself the same question.

Fed up, he had decided to get out of his bed. He turned to the kitchen, fetching a box of French toast cereal he found out about in America. They didn't fascinate him like it usually does, he might as well be eating them blindly, due to him being more enthused in other Dan-related thoughts.

Phil has established that it was human nature that made him act this way, from the very first time Dan spilled coffee on him. But he often question his own statement- because really, who gives a damn these days?

Phil doesn't want to think further. He decided to just stick to his statement- or as you can call it- his excuse.

So Phil just continued emptying his bowl of cereal, focusing on the television in front of him, trying his hardest to stay brain-dead.

But even after his small cereal break, Phil still hadn't found peace. So, he decided to make the best of the situation by pulling out his iPhone, pressing the video recorder.
‎
"Hey guys, as you can see it is now 12.37 AM, and I'm still awake, which means it's time for Another Sleepless Night With Phil!"

He can only hope that recording a video would distract him for so long.

>>>>><<<<<

A loud, shrill scream was heard yet once again in the vacation house of Troye Sivan, adding to 4 wake-up calls that night. Dan concluded that lights provided him peace after running in the never-ending realm of nightmares- at least it gave him the impression of a safe haven instead of a hellhole when he woke up.

"Dan, are you sure you're okay? You could tell me anything, you know..." A smaller man appeared at his bedroom door. Dan felt the same pang of guilt hit him once again. Tyler checked him every time he heard his cries. He really wished he was less of a coward, so he wouldn't wail at every bad dream he faced.

"No, I'm fine. Just a bad dream, or bad dreams, I guess..." Dan trailed out, not wanting to be a burden. You would normally tell Phil, though, his head voiced.

Yeah, but he isn't here.

"If you were fine, you wouldn't be having these nightmares," Tyler trailed out, yet not forcing Dan to give him any information. Dan really liked that. He really has a thing about personal space.