Adams POV:
"Alex what's wrong?"
"I just... I wish I could remember you.. you are the only thing I cant remember.. I am regaining the rest of my memory but I cant remember my own fucking boyfriend."
"I dont know either.. but remember none of this is your fault."
"Yes It is... its my fault I can't remember you and Its my fault I feel down the stairs that night."
"No it isn't. You were under the influence. Its my fault I let you have those drinks. But it doesn't matter. What matters is that your still here with me.."
"I wish I could just remember.." Alex choked out. She seemed really hurt by the fact that she couldn't remember me at all. It made me a little happier knowing she cares even if she has forgotten me.
"Hey could I ask you something?"
"Sure. Anything. " Alex replied, wiping her wet cheeks.
"Why are there fresh cuts on your wrist? and why is 'liar' engraved on it?"
Alex's POV:
My heart sank to the bottom of my stomach.. I didn't even think about that.. I can't tell him.. Even though what I engraved was true. I don't wanna hurt Adam.. if I tell him it will brake his heart and ruin my plans.. I can't do that to him.. I love him a lot.. he just doesn't know it.
"Oh those old things? They were from a while back when I was feeling depressed."
"They can't be.. I saw dried blood on them earlier this morning..."
"You must of thought you did because they are from almost a year ago..."
"Alex.. are you hiding something?"
I tear was getting ready to drop, but I quickly wiped it away.. if I show even a little bit of sadness, Adam will know something is up.
"No Adam.. I am being serious.. "
"I could have sworn I saw dry blood.. I must of been wrong. "
"Yeah.. Hey could I get dropped off at my house? I wanna just clear my mind of everything.. "
"Yeah I understand. "
We drove in silence for the next few minutes, finally getting to my house. I was about to open the car door, when Adam came around to opened it for me. He was so sweet. He doesn't deserve to be broken.. Why am I so selfish. . Why can't I suck it up so Adam and I can be happy together? Why can't I be stonger enough to carry on?
I grabbed my purse and started heading for the door. Adam grabbed my arm, turning me around to embrace me in a warm hug. This is just making it worse.. I can't get so attached to him.. even though I already am.. He let go and looked his beautiful blue eyes into my green ones.
"Be careful Alex. I love you."
"I can't promise that.. but I'll try."
Adam nodded with a tear escaping his eye as he walked away.
"Adam! Wait! I love you too.. don't ever forget that.."
"But I thought you didn't remember me?" He said stepping closer.
"I told you I was a 'liar' didn't I?"
"Wha-- Alex I knew you were hiding those.. Whats wrong? Wait does mean you know me? Were you lying this whole time?"
"I'm sorry Adam.. I'll see you later. "
I ran into my house and locked the door. I couldn't stand to hurt Adam. But I need to finish what I've started. I went over to my counter and began to write a note.. I could hear Adam pounding on the door, yelling my name.. I had to ignore it and proceed..
"Dear Adam,
You know I love you right? I love you more than anything and everything. To the moon and back. To the stars and beyond. I can't put it into words.. and please don't EVER blame yourself for what I did.. it was never you.. it was something that happened 13 years ago.. I-I didn't mean to do it.. it was a accident.. please forgive me.. I Will love you forever and always Adam ♥ Don't let this get to you.. We will see eachother again...someday..."
YOU ARE READING
Sauli or Alexis?
FanfictionAdam Lambert is about to get married to his love Sauli Koskinen, but his best friend Alexis secretly loves him. She is happy for Adam but wants him so bad. Will she be able to steal his heart before the big day?