T's Hopeline | ✓

7. The girlfriend

Hey guys, thank you for reading my book it honestly means the world to me! Could you please comment throughout the chapter and vote if you liked it? This chapter is also dedicated to the best friend ever! Thank you for everything. ♥

Tessa's POV
"Well aren't you a grumpy little baby?" It's James... I can tell by his accent, and to be honest the "why" he is calling at this hour I have no clue...

"Don't laugh at me little Brit! It's not funny, I need my damn beauty sleep or I'm going to look and feel like a freaking zombie," I rub my eyes and pinch my cheeks to make sure I'm awake and not sleepwalking... "Auch" that hurt like hell and I'm pretty sure my left cheek is tomato-red right now...

"Brit? Do you like my accent? It's one of the few things I like about myself, to be honest..." His voice's tone changed after that little question; he seemed honest but also sad about it. I have no idea what could possibly make someone feel like this about themselves... It makes me really sad that someone who sounds so freaking sweet can be feeling so down about themselves!

"Yeah, I do, I really do. I have a thing for accents and I'm obsessed with the British and the Australian, and the fact that it belongs to someone who is this sweet only makes it better!" I sit up properly instead of hugging my legs in a strange and uncomfortable way that is making my arms go numb.

"Uhm, thanks, I didn't really know people felt that way about me..."

"Really? I don't believe you! You could you not know that! You have a really nice voice and people, especially girls, must have complimented it at some point," I'm honestly wondering right now, are people honestly deaf or something... Then again I love accents and I don't really forget them however I might forget who it belongs to... Oopsies!

"I guess, maybe, I don't know, it doesn't really matter," that cannot be true but I keep my mouth shut and move on, I don't want to push it...

"James, I want to ask you something that's probably going to kill the mood completely but I really need you to tell me, in order to know how to help you and because I'm just... curious by nature..." I'm crossing my fingers and hoping he says yes.

"Um, ok I guess. I just can't promise I'll answer, though... Just... how bad is it? What do you want to know?" He is speaking in a rather hesitant tone as if he was scared of my question and what it might make him feel or remember or something...

I close my eyes and take a deep breath and gently run my fingers through my hair as he speaks and when he finishes I gently reply "I want to know what happened, what made you feel and think like this. I want to know what event, I guess, triggered your suicidal thoughts..." I can feel my heart's pace getting quicker and I am no longer sleepy, I also start tapping my fingers on my thigh while I wait for his answer.

"Well... I guess everything started because... I, I don't know. I used to be a jock, like a team captain and everything, of my school's football team and I had recruiters wanting me and sports scholarships waiting for me when I graduated and everything... On top of all that I had a girlfriend, the girlfriend, the best damn one. And then one night... I-I just lost her." Oh my, God! I didn't see that coming, and I-I didn't expect it to be this... This bad!

I lay down completely and set my free hand on my forehead, closing my eyes at the same before continuing in a very low tone. "Oh my God, how? How did you lose her, how did it happen? James, what happened??"

"It was a car crash... She was driving to the airport to pick her brother up at like 4:30 in the morning and a... a truck driver high on Mountain Dew didn't see her car. He just....... He came out without a scratch. The police told me she died on impact; at least that helped me be able to close my eyes without imagining her in excruciating pain..."

"Oh my God, James, that's so awful!" I didn't even care about the fact that he woke me up anymore, this is honestly the worst! I can't even begin to imagine losing someone I loved that much. "I'm..."

"Don't say you're sorry, just don't. Everyone has been telling me that they're 'sorry' for the past year of my life and it just does not help! It only brings back the pain, the memories and awakens my imagination to all the things we could have done, we should have done and said to each other. That we left undone and unsaid. I just started wondering what the point of it all was... What is the point in everything? So what? So what I'm the captain and I am popular? After high school, after those 4 hellish years what will be the point of it all? – My eyes are starting to tear up, all of this sounds like a movie plot of a love story gone wrong, that will end with him hanging himself or worse... I need to keep my voice steady and calm and continue to connect the dots. His state of mind is beginning to make sense...

"What-what did you after that?"

"I quit the football team. The other guys hated my guts because of it but, though they did try to force me to get back on the team, I think they understood, even if it was just a little bit... I guess they had finally realised that they sucked without me, no offence," his attempt to make a little joke about it tells me he isn't as bad, as depressed as he was when we first met. "That was when my life was turned upside down when everything changed and became pointless, meaningless and straight up a huge pain in my ass and a waste of time. I guess having everyone around feeling sorry for you and saying I should go to some kind of therapy is what brought me to this helpline. When I finally could close my eyes without thinking about everything, I found the balls to call and you were the one who answered. I guess what I'm trying to say is..."

"That the second someone, aka me, answered your call some kind of magic happened and now your life is forever changed. By the way, you are not getting rid of me anytime soon! Sorry, I just needed, although I am perfectly aware that we are having a serious conversation, to lighten up the mood a bit. I mean it is not everyday that you meet someone like me, is it?"

"No, you sure are one of a kind," I did it (I think). I believe that, by redirecting the subject a bit, I was able to make him not remember all the horrible things he went through and focus on cheering him up and nursing his state of mind back to health."

"I'm going to take that as a compliment, oh and James?" he lets out a little hesitant "Yah?" and waits for my response. "Whenever you feel like your demons are waking up and you need some help fighting them, let me know. I'll always be here to help and to listen, I'm only one call away."

"Always always? Promise?"

"Yeah, always and yes I do promise."

"Thank you, I really mean it, thank you, Tessa."

"You're very much welcome. Goodbye, try getting some sleep kiddo."

"Goodbye, I will and so should you."

"Bye."

Now that was a call worth waking up for, it allowed me to learn a lot about him and I can now go back to bed with a smile on my face because I know I helped someone who deserved to smile and laugh. 

☺ {AN}☺

Update! I hope you enjoyed it, I wanted to write about what caused it all and I hope you let me know if I did a good or a bad job at it. I really do love reading your comments so please don't forget to do it when you finish reading each chapter so I can have some feedback.

{Edited on the 20th of July 2016, there have been no major changes made...}