Closure (Karkat X Reader)

Chapter 9

Trigger warning of reference to self-harm. You have been warned.
***Karkat's POV***

I open my eyes to see darkness outside y/n's window. Shit. I fell asleep. I look down to see y/n's head asleep on my chest. Her iPad fell onto the floor, and it looks like it going to be really fucking hard to get up without waking her up. I get my phone out of my back pocket to see nine calls from Kankri, along with six texts. It's eleven at night.
Karkat? Where are you? It is getting late.
Where are you? This is beginning to trigger me.
I sigh. The other messages look nearly identical.
I'm alive, Kankri, calm your tits dude. I just fell asleep at y/n's place. I'll be home in five.
He answers instantaneously.
Alright, I was getting worried... you are still preserving your celibacy, I hope?
OH MY GOD WE JUST WATCHED A FUCKING ROMCOM AND FELL ASLEEP YOU ASS.
I am sorry, Karkat, I am just trying to make sure you are not going to make a regrettable mistake.
HOW WOULD THE ANATOMY EVEN WORK, DUDE??? I AM SERIOUSLY NOT HAVING THIS CONVERSATION WITH YOU.
You'd be surprised. I could explain it to you, if you like. You see, although trolls do not have the human...
I stare at the phone in irritated shock. A deep shade of red covers the entire area of my face.
I AM TURNING OFF MY PHONE NOW. I'LL BE HOME IN A FEW MINUTES.
I power off my phone and carefully untangle myself from y/n's grasp, then carefully pull the blanket over her sleeping body. Her breathing is even, and she looks like she's... at peace. As if whatever I always see bothering her completeley disappeared with the presence of sleep. God, I am so fucking creepy.
I go to the bathroom and close the door behind me, careful not to make any noise. I don't have to pee or anything, but I splash cold water to wipe the groginess off of my face. My sleeves get get covered in water, so I pull them up, revealing not-yet-healed scars up and down my grey forearms. I had a really tough time in New York, and once Kankri found out about my... err, problems, he seriously did not stop investigating until he found the exact source of why I did this to myself, and when he did, we ended up moving across the country. I still remember his face when he saw the word MUTANT carved into my leg. I could've covered it up if I just didn't go too deep; but I wanted more pain. After three years if doing this to myself, small cuts wouldn't help anymore. Now, however, I can't do it at all, because Kankri checks my arms and legs daily.
I pull my sleeves down and get out of the bathroom, grab my bag and head out into the night. The rain still refuses to let up, so I have to run to my building. When I open the door, Kankri sits on the couch with a cup of tea. He's watching some historical documentary about literal crabs.
"Sorry I never responded to your calls- I fell asleep, and kind of lost track of time..."
"It's quite alright, Karkat. And by 'we', I presume you are discussing y/ n, correct?"
"Umm... yeah. Please don't give me another speech, Kankri, I am really fucking tired."
"Alright, then. I will spare your ears for the time being, but I am beginning to sense flushed feelings from your end. I would just like you to know that y/ n seems like a very nice girl, but I would also like to warn you that relationships at this age can cause someone much emotional stress, and due to your previous emotional outbursts, I just would advise you to prevent your feelings from progressing until you are absolutely positive that she will not hu-"
"Oh. My fucking. God. Please just stop. I seriously have only known her for, what, two days?"
"Yes, and yet she is still your first real friend, correct?"
"Yeah."
"My point exactly."
"God dammit, are you just trying to make things worse?"
"No, but I am just trying to help. You are free to go " I sigh and saunter over to my room, closing the door softly behind me.

***Reader's POV***

I wake up to see my blanket neatly placed over me. All of my lights are off, and Karkat is nowhere to be seen.
He must've woken up and left, or something... I check my clock to see that I have actually woken up on time. It's six thirty, and it's finally Friday, though I've only been in school for two days. I climb out of bed and put on a nice blouse along with some black jeans, then put on some actual makeup. I assume Karkat will stop for coffee, so I just pour myself a bowl of cereal. I take the milk out of the cooler and smell it. Spoiled. With a more than heavy sigh, I toss the contents into the sink and throw the carton away, then sit down and try to enjoy milkless Frosted Flakes. It's hard, but I can manage.
Almost instantaneously after I finish, there's a knock at the door.
"Y/ N? Please don't tell me you forgot to set the alarm again."
"Nope!" I holler back, jumping up to open the door. When I do, he stares.
"You look... different." He says.
"Makeup does wonders." I explain, grabbing my backpack from the floor.
"Why do girls wear that shit, anyways?" We walk out and head towards his car.
​​​​​"Your reaction upon seeing me is why." I open the door and climb in.
"So you want me to think you're pretty?"
"Well not that exactly, but it just... makes you feel better about yourself, I guess? I mean, there's call of these other girls out there with big boobs and a beautiful face and everything any guy could ask for, while then there's girls like... me. I'm just average, and nowadays average just doesn't cut it in this world, I guess." I say with a huff. He starts the car and heads to Starbucks.
"Well that's really fucking dumb, if you ask me. If a guy likes you, he'll like you for who you are, not for your looks."
" You have a point, but it does not at all deter my opinion."
"It really should." He says, pulling out of the complex.