The Scars Within

Sober

My Dad doesn't take any steps toward Abel and I. He merely stands in front of the couch. After opening and closing his mouth a few times, he hangs his head, and begins to speak.

"I've been a bad- no, not bad, horrible Father. Horrible doesn't even begin to describe the things I've done. Like you said, Carmin, 'What kind of Father does that?' Not just blaming you for Mary's death, but everything. Drinking, leaving you alone when you needed me most, and, worst of all, the beating." He visibly cringed when he spat the last word out through gritted teeth. "I hate myself for that. With everything that was going on already, I just made it worse. Your Chem teacher, Mr. Dawson I think his name was, called today after you left. He told me all about the other students. I am so so so sorry Carmin. I know that doesn't fix any of this, but I want you to know that I truly am sorry." At this, he raised his head, and looked me in the eye where I was peeking around Abel. "I can't fix this, I know that. What I did will always haunt me, for the rest of my life probably. But, if you're willing to let me, I want to try and make this right. From the looks of it, your boyfriend here is about to rip my head off, and I don't blame him, I would react the same way if I saw someone do, well, that, to Mary. I completely understand if you want nothing to do with me, but I still want you to know that I'm sorry. I really, truly am."

By the time he finishes talking, he's in tears, and I can feel my eyes watering. Slowly, I move out from behind Abel. As I walk towards my Father, Abel gently grabs my hand and looks me in the eye. After I give him a small nod, he slowly lets go. Once I'm about a foot away from my Dad, I look him in the eye. I quickly raise my hand, and slap him across the face. Before he can react, I wrap my arms around him in a tight hug. The tears finally start to fall as I speak.

"I can't say that I completely forgive you. You broke my trust, and it's going to take some time for you to earn it back. I don't know how long that'll take, but... I'm willing to try if you are." Pulling away from the hug, Dad and I smile at each other. His cheek is red, but the smile is genuine as he places his hands on my cheeks.

"That's more than I deserve Carmin. Thank you." Dad moves away from me, and looks towards Abel. "You're the neighbor boy, right? Thank you, for taking care of my daughter when I couldn't. I'm sure you don't like me much, especially after my earlier actions, but it's nice to formally meet you." He holds out his hand. Abel, still slightly glaring, reluctantly takes a step forward and shakes my Father's hand. After the handshake, things get really awkward. Abel has moved back to my side, arm wrapped around my waist, and Dad is looking between us. Clearing his throat, he begins to speak again. "Sooo, anyone hungry? We could go out and get some dinner, if you'd like."

Just as Abel is about to refuse, I quickly cut him off.

"Sure Dad. Maybe you and Abel could get to know each other better?" Dad smiles and agrees, but I can feel Abel's glare piercing my skull. Turning my head up towards him, I show a mocking grin. "Doesn't that sound good to you Abel?" I question, raising my eyebrow. 'Disagree with me. I dare you Willow. I will scratch your car so fast...' Sighing in defeat, Abel grudgingly nods his head. "Great! I'll drive."

The only word that could be used to describe that car ride would be awkward. That doesn't even begin to cover it though. No one spoke a word. About halfway to the restaurant I turned on the radio because I couldn't take it anymore. It didn't help much. When we finally got to Vector 3, an old restaurant with food from across the world on the edge of town, I jumped at the chance to get out of the car.

Abel beat me to the door, and held it open for me. After all three of us were inside, we were quickly seated in a booth. Abel, of course, sat next to me, and Dad sat across the table from us. Apparently, the waitress could sense the hostility between the two males, because she seemed even more awkward than I was when taking our orders. Once the food was placed on our table, along with the drinks, she quickly made herself scarce. 'I kinda feel bad for her, I'll leave her a nice tip.' Unsurprisingly, neither Dad nor Abel says a word. Finally feeling fed up with them, I decide to try and start a conversation.

"So, Abel is going to the arts college in Jerrisville." Dad looks up from his meal for a second, then goes back to eating.

"Is that so?" Is the only reply from either of them. Actually, I take that back. Abel grunted in response. Attempt at conversation: FAIL. Sighing, I throw my head back and cross my arms. Abel and Dad both raise eyebrows at me, but don't actually say anything.

"Seriously you two? I get that you probably don't like each other but could you at least try to have a decent conversation? We've been here for about 45 minutes, plus the 20 minute car ride, and I think I've heard a total of 30 words from both of you, including when you ordered food! I want you two to get along, especially since you're the most important men in my life right now. If you aren't even willing to try, then I'm going home."

Sighing once again, I place a few bucks on the table, and stand up, starting to make my way towards the door. Behind me, I can hear both of them bickering. Shaking my head, I continue on my trek out to the car. As I'm getting buckled up in the driver's seat, the passenger and rear driver doors open up. Abel gets in the front, while Dad gets in the back, holding onto a few to-go boxes. I don't say a word, and start the car. Pulling out of the restaurant parking lot, all is silent. A few moments later, Dad speaks up.

"We're sorry, Carmin. We didn't mean to make you upset. You know how it is with guys. I'm your Dad," At that, Abel let out an almost inaudible snort. "So I feel obligated to not like your boyfriends. I'm sure Abel doesn't like me because of the incident earlier, and I truly don't blame him. We are willing to try though, for you. Right Abel?" At the last words, Abel rolls his eyes, but nods. Smiling, I thank both of them and continue to drive us all home.

'I'm sure it'll take awhile, but I'm glad to know that they'll try to get along, for me. Maybe things can be great after all.'