The Scars Within

She Knows

A couple of weeks have passed since I first cut, and I've been doing it more often. It hasn't been more than one cut at a time though. I guess it just seems to help, and I like it. It's almost like an addiction now. Whenever I have a particularly hard day at school or Dad is extremely mean I go upstairs to my bathroom, and make a single cut. Never more than that. Only one.

There's only about a month and a half left of school, which I'm grateful for. I have an apprenticeship lined up at a publishing company over in Jerrisville. The best part is I get to be out of the house five days per week for the whole summer. The pay is pretty good as well. It's Wednesday, so there's only a few days left until the weekend. Right now, the bell just rang signaling the end of the day. As usual, I had spent study hall in the library with Ricca. We may not have many classes together, but we always meet up in the library, both during lunch and at study hall. Today we were talking about a new book that came out. Of course, it was about an alternate universe, but that's what we both loved to read.

As we walked out of the library together, we said our goodbyes, and split ways, as Ricca's locker was on the opposite end of the school from mine. I slowly made my way to my locker, hoping to avoid the usual group that waits for me. Of course, it doesn't work. The moment I go around the corner I see them waiting for me. I pause in my tracks, and think about if I really need anything from my locker. 'Let's see, I finished the History homework, Geometry was a free day, same for Graphic Arts and Personal Finance/Accounting, Gym we played soccer, Chemistry... crap. The book with the homework is in my locker. Plus it's due tomorrow... Wait! I have Chemistry after lunch! I don't need to bring it home! Plus I finished the English work! Yes! Now I just need to leave before they see me.' The moment I finished my thoughts, they saw me.

Their 'leader' Jason speaks up. "Where do you think you're going Harley?"

'Shiiiiiiiiiiit' I reply, "Going home. Where else would I go after school?"

Jason Brusker. Six feet tall, captain of the soccer team, short, black hair with blond streaks in it, and 'red' eyes. They're actually colored contacts, but they look real. His two goons, Rian Yellik and Travis Posck who are also on the soccer team, always follow him around like he's some kind of God. Ever since the rumors started flying around, they've become my own living nightmare. I guess they feel powerful being able to take down a girl who won't fight back. Generally they don't do much more than insult me with the occasional shove into the lockers. It's still tiresome though.

"I was just wondering if you were trying to avoid us. I mean, you wouldn't do that, would you Harley? Why would you avoid us when it's always so much fun to hang out together?" 'Yea. So much fun hanging out with you. I've always had a pain fetish afterall. Insolent little dunderhead.'

I decide not to respond, since I know he was being rhetorical. Since they already know I'm here, I just go to my locker to grab the Chemistry work. Once I close the locker and turn around, I see that the trio has gotten closer, surrounding my at my locker. How'd I know that was going to happen?

"Leaving us so soon Harley? You never want to talk to me anymore. What happened? We used to be best buddies back in middle school." Pouting, Jason leans on the locker next to mine, looking me in the eye. Yea, key word in that statement being used. When we were little, Jason and I would hang out all the time. We were practically inseparable. Then, around 8th grade, things changed. He started joining sports, and basically became the stereotypical jock; being mean to everyone and thinking he's hot shit. We stopped hanging out after that. Mostly because his 'friends' said it was wimpy to hang out with a girl.

"The last time I checked Jason, you were the one who stopped talking to me. Now, if you would please call your goons off, I have to go home now." By the way his eyes narrowed, I knew that was the wrong thing to say.

"Feeling cocky today, aren't we Carmin. I can't see why. You have no power here anymore. Your empire has fallen. How's it feel, being back on the bottom? Feels a bit strange, not having people grovel at your feet, am I right? Maybe you should do us all a favor and come down off your high horse. Better yet, stay on the horse, but use it to leave town. Just because you won't admit it doesn't mean we all don't know you killed your Mother. It would be better for everyone if you would just turn yourself in. Then Leon could come back to school and everything could go back to normal."

Chuckling, I reply to him. "You're more stupid than I though Jason. Do you honestly think that I enjoyed people practically worshipping me? All I ever wanted was to be a background character, but it's kind of hard to do that when you have parents like mine. Practically everything you do makes the news, people always compare you and your achievements to those of your parents, and you're expected to be prim and proper all the time. I NEVER WANTED THIS! You can have my life if you want it. I could really care less. I never made anyone grovel at my feet, that was their choice. So why don't you and your cronies leave me alone and focus on more important things like how many chicks you can 'get' in a week." Once I finish speaking, I try to push Jason out of the way, only to have him force me back against the lockers.

"Did I say you could leave Carmin?" Jason growled out. Looking into his eyes, I see nothing but rage. "Nice try, playing the victim and everything. For a second I almost believed the shit pouring from your mouth. Too bad for you, but I can tell when people are lying. It's not hard to tell that you enjoy the attention. Tell me, Carmin, what kind of sick person kills their own mother? What, were you afraid your image would be ruined once word of the divorce got out?" I freeze and look at him wide-eyed. How'd he know about the divorce? "Don't give me that look Carmin. It seems like you forget that my Dad is the county Judge. Who did you think your parents would go to in order to get divorced? And you think I'm the idiot." For a few minutes, we just stare at eachother. Then, he smirks. "You know, if you weren't a murderer, I would actually think about making you one of my conquests. Too bad. I'm sure the people in prison will treat you nice. Once you admit you killed her of course. Do us all a favor and do it quick, we're all tired of the news being focused on the school and your family." As Jason moved away from me, Rian and Travis move in. Once Jason is about halfway down the hall, he calls out over his shoulder, "Take care of her, won't you boys?"

Those were the last words spoken before Rian and Travis started to hit me. Granted, they didn't do much, but it was enough to bruise and hurt pretty bad. In reality it was probably only a shove into the lockers, a few hits, and maybe a kick or two. I don't really know since I just tuned out the world for those few minutes. After they left, I picked up the books I had dropped and started to make my way out of the school. As I turned the corner, I noticed someone standing on the opposite end of the hall I was just in. I decided to ignore them, figuring it was another one of my tormentors. What I didn't know, was that assumption was completely and utterly wrong. It was Ricca at the end of that hall.

And she had seen everything.