Saving Rose

Shaky Confessions

Hey! Oh my gosh I saw Pierce The Veil, A Day To Remember, and Asking Alexandria yesterday. Best. Day. Ever. Pierce The Veil is literally the reason I'm still alive. They played the BEST songs (Hold On Till May, Bulletproof Love, A Match Into Water, King For A Day, and Stained Glass Eyes and Colorful Tears) and I totally cried during Hold On Till May because it was so perfect. Everything was perfect. The crowd was nice, and every time I got shoved into a mosh pit or hit or fell down or needed to get out because of my stupid asthma, everyone would help. I... I can't believe how amazing it was. I sang so loud my throat was sore this morning. I'm so thankful for Pierce The Veil. Yesterday was my first concert ever, kind of sad for a high schooler, and I'll never forget it:D
So, sorry for blabbing. Just had to freak out on you guys because it was so awesome ;)
I hope you enjoy :)



I'm terrified. I don't know what to do. I've never really understood the phrase 'paralyzed with fear' until now.

I'm pregnant. I have a child inside of me. Growing, living, getting bigger by the hour. And when it's time, she, or he, will come into my crazy world of rock hands and music and we'll be a family. I think it's a girl. I feel it. I'm almost positive. The baby, Jaime, and I, all happy together. And our child will start playing around with Jaime's bass before she learns her alphabet, and later on, she'll learn guitar. Maybe from Uncle Vic or Uncle Tony. Everything will be perfect.

If Jaime even wants a kid.

I'm going to tell him when he gets off the stage after Pierce The Veil's performance. Austin's the only one who knows right now, and only because he pressured it out of me. He knows me too well. He came onto the bus a few minutes after I had looked at the test results. Positive.

Austin's saying that everything will be okay. And even though a strong part of me believes him, I can't help but be nervous.

Austin and I are waiting together. We're on side stage. I'm watching Jaime do what he loves. I wonder what we'll do about tours. If Jaime not wanting to leave would cause problems with the band. He'd have to stop working so hard. He wouldn't be able to go out so often and drink with the guys. He wouldn't be able to hang out with fans as often.

"Stop," Austin begs, sighing frustratingly. I know why he's like this. He doesn't want me to back down and not tell Jaime.

"I'm telling him. I- he deserves to know, whether he's happy with it or not," I say, more to convince myself than Austin now.

"Suddenly, the last chord of Hold On Till May rings out, just as the arena goes black. A fresh wave of fear comes, and I stare at the ground until I can regain my composure. Jaime and the rest of the band walk off the stage, each going to the tech assistant for their instrument. They hand the guitars and bass over, then each go to get a bottle of water. Vic wanders off to talk to fans, like he does a lot, and Mike follows him, definitely like a little brother. Tony starts to talk to the guitar tech, Matt, and Jaime walks straight towards me. His smile slowly turns to a worried frown, so my face must show my nervousness.

"You okay?" He asks gently, putting his hand on my cheek. I feebly shake my head no, which causes him to engulf me in a fragile hug.

"I need to tell you something," I say quietly, barely making a noise. Jaime nods with a new found seriousness. I know in that moment that he's bracing himself for the worst. I hope it's not as bad as he's expecting, at this point.

"I'm pregnant," I blurt out as fast as I can in one breath. I watch closely as his face transforms first to shock, then to joy, and not even a moment later, he's smiling. I let out a sigh of relief, and we both nervously chuckle. He glances down at my stomach, which definitely isn't showing yet.

"Wow," he smiles, poking my stomach with precaution. "There's a little thing in there!"

I burst out laughing. He's so unaware sometimes that his words cheer me up so easily. "It's our little thing," I correct him softly, and give him a proud smile.

The next moment, his lips are on mine, and his hands are holding me close, as close as we can get.

"I'm so excited!" He whispers in between adoring kisses. I reply that I am too.

After a few more minutes of our "celebration," we pull away reluctantly. I take that opportunity to look around. Austin must have slipped away when Jaime came over. So he didn't stick around to see how Jaime would take it. Or maybe he already knew.

"When do you want to tell everyone?" He asks me, grinning. I shrug. I feel a little guilty that Jaime wasn't the first to know.

"You and Austin are the only ones who know," I tell him, "since Austin, well, he just came right after I found out, and he knows me too well..."

Jaime sighs. "Hey, don't look so sad. I don't mind at all. I'd be scared to tell me, too. You were probably a little worried that I'd leave you, right?" I nod, and he continues. "There wasn't a chance that he'd leave you or be mad at you because of this. I completely understand."
And his words prove he does. I don't know how, but he does.

"Let's announce it at one of the tour potlucks," I suggest, right back to my previous excitement over our child. Jaime nods vigorously, showing that he likes my idea.

"Yeah!" He exclaims, kissing my forehead lightly. "When?"

I shrug. "Well, there's one tomorrow, if you're ready," I say, and he looks a little nervous for a moment, before nodding slightly.

"Okay, I- that's really soon, but it's a good idea."

Jaime and I decide to make the announcement together. That shows that even though the baby isn't even born yet, he's never going to let me hanging. It's a team effort. The only way we'll get through this both happy and sane is if we work together.