Her Absent Memory

Chapter Four

I pull into my driveway and rest my forehead against my steering wheel. Taking a deep breath, I pull my backpack onto my arm and get out of the vehicle. I shut the door and lock my car before walking up to my front door. From the corner of my eye, I see Cora stomping down the sidewalk. I unlock the door and enter my house, feeling better already.

My older sister, Parker, reclines on the couch. She plays Candy Crush on her iPhone while watching reruns of Danny Phantom. Her long, brown hair is pulled into a sloppy bun and she wears a hoodie and baggy sweatpants. I envy her for getting to spend the day at home. She's a freshman in college, so she's still on summer break. Which I'm happy about, since she's one of my favorite people.

Parker is a care-free person and she doesn't really pay any mind to what other people think of her. I've always been jealous of that, but I've learned a lot from my big sister. She's never had any problem being herself. My parents have always referred to her as the "simple child" because of it. I was the next kid, then Caiden, then Blaine, and finally Holden. I guess when it comes to names, my parents are creative people.

"Hey, Parker," I say, shutting the door behind me.

"What's up, punk?" She greets, "Have a good first day?"

"It was mediocre at best. I guess Cora and I are fighting." I inform her as I roam to the kitchen for an after school snack.

"Already?" She snickers as she changes the channel during a commercial.

"Yeah... She's so stupid sometimes." I nab a can of Sprite from the fridge and crack it open.

"Everybody has their moments," Parker tells me from the other room.

"I guess. Holden get home yet?" I ask, taking a sip of Sprite.

"He followed Caiden to the skate park."

"Caiden must be pissed." I snicker, hauling my backpack upstairs.

When I reach the top of the stairs, Titus attacks me with tons of kisses. He yips excitedly and wags his tail. I'm the only one that this vicious little schnauzer loves and I'm totally okay with it. I'm glad that Titus will always love me, no matter who I hang out with.

"Hi, Titus. How are you, boy? How was your day?" I smile down at him and scratch his furry little chin.

He barks and charges into my room after me. I close the door and flop down on my bed. Titus jumps onto the bed and curls up beside me. I pet him with one hand and pull out my phone with the other. I stare at the screen hard, wondering whether or not I should get Riley's number and apologize. But I just can't make up my mind. Instead, I pull out my math notebook and a review quiz. I finish my homework before I finally decide to talk to Riley. I unlock my phone again and shoot a text to Luc. He's popular, so he's got to know someone that's friends with Riley.

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I quickly turn the steering wheel of my beat up Mustang, screeching around the corner to my street. I laugh and slam on the brakes as I park beside my mobile home. I managed to leave the car only inches from my dad's girlfriends car. I carelessly throw the door open and hit the side of her car. I smile to myself and kick her car door as I walk over to the front door. I climb the four steps to get inside and when I enter the trailer, my nose is filled with the scent of cigars and cigarettes. I slam the flimsy screen door behind me and fling my backpack onto the couch. Sure enough, my dad's girlfriend, Angela, strolls into the living room with a cigarette in her hand. She blows out a mouthful of smoke and leans against the doorway.

"How was the first day of the new school?" Angela asks, quirking a brow at me.

"Fine." I say as she hands me a cigarette, which is the only thing she's good for.

I pull my lighter from my pocket and light the end of the cigarette. I take a long drag and sloppily blow it all out at once. I plop down onto the couch and stretch out.

"Your dad's out at the liquor store. He'll be back in a while." She tells me before disappearing back into the bedroom.

"Of course he is." I mutter under my breath, beginning to take another drag.

I sit on the couch and practice blowing smoke rings for at least twenty minutes. I've almost got it perfect when I'm distracted by the sound of my cell phone buzzing. I pick it up and see that I've gotten a text from a random number. Curiously, I open it and read it to myself quietly.

"Hey, you. It's Sutton. I just wanted to apologize for today. I was rude for no reason and I let someone else's opinions influence my actions. I would really like to be your friend and I hope you can forgive me."

I shrug and push the butt of my cigarette into the ash tray on the table beside the couch. I don't see any reason to not accept her apology. I like Sutton. She's cute and she seems simple enough. I guess I can find it in my cold, dead heart to forgive her. I call her up and smile when she answers the phone.

"Hello?" She asks.

"After some serious consideration, I've decided to accept your apology. Do you want to-"

I'm interrupted by the sound of the door slamming a few feet away from me. I quickly sit up and turn around, locking eyes with my father. His greasy face is bright red and he clenches his fists. He looks at me for a moment before stepping closer and beginning to remove his belt. I stand up and begin slinking away.

"I can't even fucking believe it. I got fired again! I'm so sick of this shit! I'm so sick of working! It's all your fault I have to work," He shouts, jabbing an accusing finger at me, "This is all your fucking fault!"

My dad is the only person I've ever truly feared. He was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was just a kid. He had a terrible childhood, so his entire adult life revolves around making sure I have a terrible childhood too. After his mother couldn't successfully terminate her pregnancy, he was put up for adoption. He was handed off to a couple that would beat him constantly. I guess in his mind, it makes sense to beat your kid when you get upset. After all, that's the only thing he's ever known.

I won't take his shit without a fight, though. I never have and I never will. "It's not my fault, you fucker! It's your own fault! No wonder they fire you, you're fucking awful." I scream back at him.

He slaps me as hard as he can across the face and I hesitate for a moment. The entire side of my face gets hot and I can feel the burning sensation spreading throughout my skin. I turn to face him again before flashing him a devious grin.

"I can't wait til the day you die and go to Hell."

And that's the straw that breaks the camel's back.