Destiel Imagines

20. please don't hurt me anymore (angst)

warning: ANGST! LOTS OF ANGST! THE ANGSTIEST ANGST OF ALL ANGSTING! YOOUU HAAVE BEEENN WAARRNNED!

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"You're pathetic," whispered Dean, dragging the knife across Castiel's pale skin. "You're worthless. You are nothing to me, Cas."

Cas sobbed breathlessly as blood streamed down his face; he strained at the bonds that held him. "Dean, please," he choked out.

Dean blinked, and his eyes flickered black. "Oh, you poor, dear little angel," he murmured in a husky voice, his lips hovering just a breath away from Cas's. He dug the angel blade in again, smiling softly as Cas screamed in agony. "You poor little lost thing. No one's coming for you, you pathetic piece of shit. You are alone."

"No," Cas sobbed. "Don't say that to me, Dean. Don't you dare say that to me."

"But it's true, love." Dean's smile flashed innocently in the darkness. "Sam's dead. Your brothers and sisters - all dead. I killed them all, everyone you've ever loved, and now it's your turn to follow them." He traced Cas's jawline with the tip of the blade. "But don't worry, little one. I'll take it slow. And by the time we're finished, you'll wish you'd never known my name."

No. No. "You're wrong."

"I hate you, Cas. With every bone in my fucking body. God, I hate you so damn much." Dean gritted his teeth as he cut another deep line into Cas's flesh, causing the angel to scream and tremble in overwhelming pain. "I want you to know that before you die. I want you to realize that you truly, truly are alone."

Then he held the dagger over Cas's heart, its tip brushing his skin. Cas cried out as Dean plunged the blade into -

"Cas!" shouted Dean, grabbing his angel and desperately trying to calm him down. Cas sobbed, thrashing at the bedsheets and clawing at Dean in a panic. "Cas, wake up! It's a dream!"

Cas's eyes flew open, and he stared at Dean in disbelief and horror. "D-Dean." With no warning, he shoved Dean away, stumbling out of the bed and taking off down the hall.

"Cas!" Dean shouted, hurrying after him. "Cas, what the hell has gotten into you?"

He burst into the kitchen, where Cas shrank back against the counter, his face pale and his hands shaking. "P-please," he said, his voice almost a whimper. "Dean, please - please don't. Please don't hurt me anymore, please..."

"Hurt you? Cas what the hell are you - Cas!" Dean exclaimed, halting as Cas pulled a knife from the drawer and gripped it with white knuckles. Dean held his hands up, trying to appear as unthreatening as possible. "Cas, you need to calm down. Come on, baby."

"I'm sorry," Cas sobbed, shrinking back into the corner and holding the knife tighter. He was completely delirious. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Dean, please, please don't hurt me."

"Cas, I'm not going to hurt you!" Dean wrestled the knife away from Cas, throwing it aside, out of reach. Cas cowered, covering his face with his hands. "N-no...Dean, please, please don't..."

Gently Dean wrapped his arms around Cas, holding him close until the Cas's trembling subsided. "Cas," he murmured. "Come on, you're okay. It's okay. You were dreaming, baby. It's over now."

"Y-you hurt me," Cas whispered as tears dripped down his cheeks. "You killed them, you killed them all. You hated me. You looked me in the eye and told me that you, you wanted to kill me, you wanted to see me in pain..." He couldn't speak for crying.

"Shh. Shh. It's okay now." Dean bit his lip, trying to hold back an overwhelming wave of sadness. It hurt to realize that his angel thought of him as a threat - that he was afraid of him. "I swear, Cas, I would never, ever hurt you. I love you. So damn much. You know that, don't you?"

Cas dried his tears on Dean's sleeve, sinking into the warmth of the hunter's embrace. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm so sorry, Dean, I'm so sorry."

"No, don't apologize, it wasn't your fault."

"It was my fault. I'm stupid, I'm so stupid. I shouldn't have panicked like that...I should have calmed myself down instead of acting on instinct."

Dean wrapped his arms around the angel's small form and gently kissed him, closing his eyes and brushing his lips against Cas's. Cas took in a shaky breath, his forehead resting against Dean's.

"I love you, Cas," said Dean under his breath. "I hope you know that. I love you."

Cas closed his eyes. "Forgive me, Dean. I love you."