Fragile Heart (Niam)

Chapter Thirty: Normal

I'm sorry that this is pretty late. But I hope you enjoy!

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February 14th - 11:42 PM

I'm so sorry that it had to come down to this. Please promise me that you won't be mad. If there is anyone to be angry with, it's me. I wish I can take it all back, but I can't. This was my mission. And it is complete. I deeply apologize for bringing you in this, but you're out now. You're free.

February 14th - 7:12 PM

Green changes to yellow which is quickly supplanted by red. Colorful blurred lines of red, silver, black and blue come to a slow halt until they take the metallic forms of cars. Headlights illuminate the silvery icy snowflakes sprinkling towards the ground. I shove my hands in my pockets and duck my head further into my scarf. That scarf that my baby gave me for Christmas. A sudden warmth floods and pools in the pit of my stomach. The red hand quickly changes into the glowing man and I start walking. There is a certain skip and flutter in my steps as my feet bounce on the snow covered crosswalk. With each step, the warmth in my chest ripples throughout me until my whole body is just levitating. The headlights of the cars shoot their beams of incandescent of light, creating a ghastly halo around my muscular frame. I smirk once my foot makes contact with the sidewalk. And just like that, the blinking hand becomes solid. Cars whiz behind me, becoming the blurred colors zipping up and down the adjacent roads. I continue to stroll down the sidewalk, my feet carrying me to my destination while my mind brings me to a concern only moments ago.

Halo. What a paradoxical word choice. Something that only angels and saints have? To describe me? A demon? Well technically, halo didn't describe me. It was just something to describe how the headlights were shining their lights, but still. There is no way that I should ever use that word. I only use it to describe an actual angel. A blonde blue-eyed gorgeous one. My feet continue to carry me to the corner of the street, but my mind still wanders. Halo? This is actually amusing. A demon using such a disgustingly heavenly connotative word is actually unheard of. I have to physically stop and stand in the middle of the sidewalk because this is just too mind boggling. Some people walking bump into me abruptly, not necessarily expecting someone to just stop in a bustling crowd. But that doesn't matter. I just need to do it again. Let the feeling of the word hang on my tongue.

Halo.

My chest gets just a little bit warmer. I feel just a little bit lighter. The smile already on my face gets just a little bit wider. All very unexpected reactions to testing the word out again. More blood rushes to my cheeks as they start to cramp. My heart flutters and I feel like flying. Light tones of bells and whistles ring in my head as the warmth throughout my entire body sparks and zaps all of my nerves. The immense amount of happiness with the current situation of my life tugs my chest a little. In any other situation, I would be a little scared. But I'm not. Because I seem to know what that feeling is. Because I know the exact reason why I'm feeling this way. Niall. He's the reason why I feel no uncertainty when using angelic terms. He's the reason why I can fully acknowledge the churning sensation in my chest. The feeling of some of the black tar chipping away.

I could stay in this trance forever. That would be nice. To settle down. To be around my flower all the time so that all the sins harbored in my soul can be long forgotten. Long forgiven. To be around my angel for so long that killing - that sinning - is no longer an option.

"My my, sir. If I didn't know any better I would think you're dead," a crinkly voice full of years of content breaks me out of my reverie. My glazed eyes sharpen and the surroundings clear up from the colorless senseless void. Splashes of color suddenly appear in front of me and in my peripheral. Different scents harmonize together in a floral symphony as they dance and swing across my nose. There is a certain very sweet very different scent that doesn't necessarily mingle well with the other floral fragrances. As a matter of fact, the scent doesn't smell floral at all, but I pay it no mind. And in front of me is Maria, one of the kindest women I've ever met who happens to be the owner of the flower shop. The warmest of smiles graces her face, her chocolate brown eyes crinkled with joy. The cramps in my cheeks pang a little more as my smile becomes impossibly wider. Because Maria is always so nice.