I kissed the scars on her skin

Chapter 8

You'll never be good enough. You'll always be just a failure.

Oh Cassidy why can't you do anything right.

I bolted awake from my dream or should I say nightmare.

Then I screamed. I screamed it out. But the voices wouldn't go away. Their words kept repeating in my head.

Soon the lights were being flipped on and the boys were running toward my bunk.

I was almost yanked out by Tony and he was holding me in his arms. I was crying and I could barely hear anything anyone was saying.

" What happened?" Tony asks

" It was a nightmare." I say even though I knew it was much more than that

Mike brought me a glass of water and Flower. Vic knelt in front of me and was being my comforting best friend.

And Jaime stood around like he didn't know what to do. I was still crying but I wasn't screaming anymore.

" Hey Princess. Do you want me to sing to you?" Vic asks

I nod my head afraid that if I talk my voice will be all shaky.

" Bulls In The Bronx?" Vic asks

Again I nod my head. And Vic begins to sing. I cuddle Flower , the stuffed skunk Jaime had given me, and mouth the words to my favorite song .

My eyes were tear stained and heavy. But I knew I couldn't go back to sleep. Tony still had his arms around me in an embrace only and older brother could give.

He was being so comforting though he didn't have a single clue about what I was going through.

Once Vic was finished singing  I wiped my eyes and we all went back to bed. Though I didn't sleep a wink.

When I was still lying  awake I thought about how distressed Jaime looked. He had wanted to help I know but he didn't seem to know how.

But in a way he did help. I had Flower with me giving me comfort so in a way it was like Jaime comforting me.

The voices were right I can't do anything right. I'll always be the same emotional , clumsy girl know as Cassidy Perry.

But some people just refer to me and Tony Perry's little sister. I'm nothing important. Nothing special.

Just another random fucking person in the world. You know why? Because no one gives a shit about Cassidy Perry .

Why should they? I'm nothing compared to my brother. It's always been that way.

But not that I don't mind. But seriously guys would only like me because of my brothers fame.

When the others woke up I slide out of my bunk. I assumed they had gone to the back. So I headed to the back myself I saw them in a huddle.

No doubt they were talking about me. When I went inside they got quiet. Now I know for sure they were talking about me.

I sat on the couch and turned on Star Wars not making eye contact with any of them. Nor speaking to them either.

When Vic came and sat next to me I could see bags under his eyes.

And it was all because of me.

They had a show tonight too. Uh it won't be one of their bests unless they pull through. Which I knew they would.

They always did. It was kind of their job to.

" How's you sleep?" Vic asks

" Fine." I say though it was a lie because I didn't go back to sleep at all