Kendall

4

    Fourth hour, Geometry II, means I can finally shut my brain down and drift away for 45 minutes while Ms. Suzette drones on about numbers.

   I think of this afternoon, and how it will play out. I'm hoping that I will meet up with Peter's friends, introduce myself, and goof around, have fun, and make some a friend or two like a normal 17 year old girl. But the exact opposite will happen. I can feel it.

   Everyone knows my family is dead, but they don't know that I caused them to die.

   Peter's friends would avoid me, just like they do now. They would think I was a freak and they would laugh and stare. This plan of Peter's wasn't to help me meet new people, it was for him and his friends to ridicule me, it had to be. What else would the most popular group want to do with me?

   I try to think back to the people I see Peter hanging out with the most, which hard was very hard to do considering he was a social butterfly. Two people came to mind; Joseph Rusakova, a Russian exchange student and Rodger Gremillion, the star of the basketball team. Would it be just boys? Or would a girl or two be in the mix? Being alone with a bunch of strange boys made me uneasy and the thought makes me start gnawing on my lip. I had to tell Peter no. I would make up some phony excuse and bail out on him.

   I realize the bell has rung after Mrs. Suzette clears her throat and sends me an icy glare. The last student files out. "Sorry," I whisper, though I really don't know why, and grab my bag before shuffling my way out and finally to lunch. I would see Peter there and tell him I couldn't make it this afternoon. But when I get there, I can't find him anywhere. Not with the jocks, or the cheerleaders, or the skaters, or even the the art kids.

   I hold up the line still looking for him and everyone behind me gets agitated. I grab a salad and a water bottle before paying the  grumpy old lunch lady. I turn and stand there for a moment like a complete idiot in search for Peter and a place to sit. Every table is occupied, but I decide to go to the first table to my left.

    My... acquaintance, May Dady sits there alone, with a book in front of her nose and her tray of food untouched. My chair screeches across the floor and May shifts in her seat. She sighs, glances at me, and then returns to her book. The cover has a girl and a boy on it looking into each others eyes, smiling, like they knew something everyone else didn't. I used to be a romance book hoarder. I would speed through a book or two in a week, maybe in one single day if they were really good. "Is that a good book?" I ask. Once again I'm surprised I'm speaking.

   May is the school loner. The first few days of school, she attempted to talk to me. "Since we both didn't have friends." She said to me. But I was uninterested in her company then, so she eventually left me alone. Our conversations were strained. I am sure she was glad to quit speaking to me. Every now and then we have a short and sweet talk. I guess today might be one of those days.

   May looks up and wrinkles her nose. "Uh, yeah. It is." Her tone is irritable. Okay, well she obviously still does not enjoy my company. I poke at my salad and nibble on a piece of lettuce until I catch May looking at me again. Her paper thin dark red hair is covering one brown eye, the other was in a slit. I took me a moment to realize that she was glaring at me.

   I sigh and throw my fork into the salad bowl. "What?" I snap. May looks hurt and glances back at her book. "Want me to leave?" I ask. May shakes her head and shrugs her shoulders.

 " No," she sighs. "I welcome the unexpected company." Hmph. Funny way of showing it. I sip at my water and twirl the cap on the table.

   "Still ignoring everyone, May?" I don't understand what was wrong with me today. I just kept... talking. To everyone.