Seven | Book 1 (An EXO fiction)

6.

~Chapter 6: Changing Perspectives~

I wake to the unpleasant feeling of the sun shining through my window straight onto my face. It's as if it decided that perhaps if it fried me to a crisp I would leave the soul sucking attitude behind. Maybe it could fry it away; I wanted it to. The intensity of the rays of the sun, mixed with the cool air in the room was too much to sleep through. As much as I wanted to continue lying here, I knew that I had to get up.

Slowly opening my eyes, the first thing that I see is that there is another, very attractive, figure sitting on the ground right beside my bed just...looking at me.

My eyes widen.

His eyes widen, and we both stare in shock for a solid 10 seconds before we simultaneously jump up. I nearly topple off the bed trying scoot to the opposite end of the mattress and he jumps to his feet and presses himself against the closest wall, immediately casting his eyes down.

"Jongin..." I croak out in my horrid morning voice. I sound as if I'm not sure that it is him, and I'm not. Am I still dreaming? Why would I be dreaming about the boy I haven't said more than 3 words to? Is this actually Jongin? I rub furiously at my eyes hoping that I can clear away my early morning sight and mental haze through physical means.

I see him opening his mouth to (probably) explain himself, but I decide to voice my own plaguing thoughts before he can find the words. "I'm sorry." He closes his mouth and looks up briefly in confusion before looking back down. I sigh and scratch my head as I search for a genuine way to phrase what I want to say. "I was out of line. The other week when I called you a mu-" I catch my mistake and quickly change my phrasing, "when I called you the M word. I shouldn't have called you that, and I shouldn't have addressed you so disrespectfully."

He nods showing that he's hear me, but he makes no move to leave or look up at me. I crawl off my bed and pad over to the boy, stopping a foot or so away from him. "Am I really that scary to you?" I ask quietly. He stays immobile. His silence says more than words ever could. I find myself swallowing down my own nervousness and ducking so that I can look at his face and force him to make eye contact with me. He continues to avoid and I place a hand softly on his cheek. His eyes stop wandering and finally look at my face; I smile weakly. He has a beautiful face, and his eyes are adorable.

I guide his face so that he can stand straight with his head forward, and so that I don't have to be awkwardly ducked under him. I don't miss how he seems to be holding his breath, and has been since I put my hand on his face.

"Jongin...look, you don't have to be afraid of me. I am not going to hurt you okay?" I say softly. His eyes flicker across my face and when they land on my eyes I can see just how vulnerable and small he seems. Someone as tall and handsome as him shouldn't have to be this afraid of someone as small and average as me. All of my prejudice disappears for a moment as I observe the male in front of me. Is this fear because of me?

I want to comfort him, but the only way I can think of is to hug him. That's how Momm- she would comfort us, and that's how Tao would comfort me. So I find myself wrapping my arms around the boy in front of me. He tenses almost immediately, so I squeeze him lightly and press my cheek against his shoulder.

Please don't be afraid of me anymore. I think in my head.

He doesn't hug me back, but he does relax in my arms and he lets go of the breath he had been holding in. I only hope that I hadn't accidently spoken my thoughts out loud. I can hear his heartbeat slowing and I exhale as I relax as well. Okay. This is progress.

The door to my room slams open and Kris's right hand man and sidekick walks in animatedly, "Hey, it's time for breakfast we're having...Jongin?" His sentence changes to one of confusion, and Jongin and I break apart. 5 feet of space separate us and we both look down in embarrassment. The situation wasn't compromising, and I don't know why I feel as though I've committed some sin by doing what I did. Yet, I still feel as though I just got caught doing something wrong.