Surviving the Dark

Chapter 12 - Fears

The nightmares are getting worse.

When I arrived in Quelia, that first night I had one. I thought that since I didn't have another one, I was getting better. That I was finally coming to terms with being the last pixie.

Until last week that is. Sure I've had the odd one here and there, but there were not of my past or anything to do with pixies and Black Eyed Soulless Shadows.

But last week they came back with a vengeance.

I've been here for four months now. And I can feel myself breaking in a good way.

I've learnt to keep walls up. Emotional ones. Blocking everything and everyone out. Not allowing anyone to get close to me in fear that I would cause them pain.

Being with the Blu siblings, I can feel my walls breaking. When I told them about my family, minus everything about pixies, I knew that was only the beginning. I was opening up more. Telling them things I had never told anyone.

My head and heart are not agreeing. My head is telling me to pull back and put my walls back up. While my heart is telling me, it's okay, that I can be open and honest and that I am safe here.

I don't know which one to believe and follow. Generally, they work in sync and tell me the same thing.

"Earth to Is." I shook my head clearing my thoughts and looked to Liv.

"Yeah?"

"I asked if you wanted to watch a movie with me? The boys are out for the night, so we have the place to ourselves. I'm thinking pizza, popcorn, and a chick flick." Her green eyes were shining bright just by thinking about our boy free night.

"Sounds good. I'll order the pizza and pop the popcorn, you go and pick the movie." I walked into the kitchen and put a few spoonful's of popcorn kernel's in a brown paper bag and put it in the microwave for a minute. I then continued to order a large BBQ chicken pizza. It was mine and Liv's favourite.

Once all the popcorn was popped, I found the icing sugar and sprinkled it over the popcorn.

I walked into the lounge room as Liv was putting her choice of movie on. I spotted the case for it on the coffee table. She picked one of my all-time favourite films.

Love Actually.

She took a handful of popcorn as the movie started.

"Oh my gosh! What did you do to the popcorn?" She asked.

"I popped it?"

"Oh, some one is a smart arse today. No I mean the flavour. I normally just put salt on it, but this is so much better."

"It's just icing sugar."

Her eyes almost popped out of her head. I just shrugged, turning to watch the movie.

About half way into the movie the pizza arrived. When the movie ended, we put another one on, but it ended up just being on as background noise as we chatted. Liv had the idea to paint our nails and style each others hair.

Mine had grown a lot in the last few months. It was no longer the shaggy bob that it was when I first met Liv. It was now past my shoulders falling down my back in long waves.

I painted Liv's nails navy blue with grey and silver accents, and she painted my baby blue with gold accents. When she styled my hair, it felt like it took forever when it actually took thirty minutes.

She brushed, pulled and sprayed my hair. When she was done, I was allowed to look. Liv had parted my hair to the side creating almost a side fringe. She had wrapped my hair around a curling iron, emphasising my waves and had pinned back a few strands from my face.