Looking Through Me | Attack on Titan Fan Fiction

Chapter 9: Bladed Fury

We all learn from our mistakes? Thanks for that, but I don't think so.

"Ack!" I hit the ground again, Mikasa pressing her blade to my throat, her foot on my chest.

She sized me up for a moment, before stepping off me and offering her hand. I took it, and Mikasa pulled me to my feet after I coughed out the dirt I'd swallowed when I hit the ground a hundred times prior.

"Jennika, c'mon. You aren't learning anything!" she said exasperatedly.

"I'm sorry! I'm scared that if I go too fast that you won't put up your guard in time! What if I hurt you?"

She sighed, and massaged the bridge of her nose. "That won't happen. Unless you start going full throttle, you'll never learn."

First of all, let me clear things up for you. It had been nearly a week about learning about Titans, and I swear I'd rather have been eaten by one. Armin tried his hardest, and taught me tons of concepts that I never knew before. I had to pretend like I didn't know anything and like I never watched the show, which wasn't that hard but required a little bit of restraint. I'd even aced the test that he made for my learning purposes, which had shitloads of trick questions. All in all, I managed.

My hip had really started to heal quickly after Armin gave me that special ointment. He told us that the reason he was gone so long is because he was trying to look for a serum to help with the healing. Of course, Eren nearly strangled the poor guy to death, saying that even another minute or so and it might've been the end for me. Like always, trusty Mikasa punched Eren and he calmed down. Armin gave me the ointment, and I applied it sparingly every day or so, keeping it in my back pocket. My hip did hurt every now and then, but I brushed it off. I even started practicing tactical combat and how to use blades.

Which, I should mention, I was failing desperately at.

We were in the courtyard, the high walls around us and Eren on duty to make sure Titans didn't make snacks out of us. The grass grew green between the stone tiles, formed into a giant convoluted circle, the epicenter of the abandoned castle.

I held up my blade, but Mikasa ducked and gave me a sharp uppercut from below, right in my stomach. After being launched back a few feet, I hit the ground yet again. "Nngh..."

Whereas I was sweating like a pig, Mikasa hadn't even broken a sweat. "Jennika, the blades aren't meant for defense. They'll shatter. Use your body as your defense, with positions to avoid my offensive attacks, whatever they may be. Get up and we'll try again."

I got up, and looked at my knuckles. They were skinned and raw from pushing myself up every thirty seconds for the past three hours.

This time, I held my blade with one hand, and held up my other arm to absorb attacks. Mikasa ran at me again, and when I expected her to punch, I lowered to the ground. Instead, she jumped up and brought her heel down on my arm, sending me sprawling forward to my new best friend: the ground.

Mikasa rubbed some dust off the shiny metal of her blade, and gave me a side glance. "You can't expect me to punch all the time. You have to adapt to the situations you're given, like I did. I knew that with your arm raised, I couldn't get your sides so instead I went above because I knew it's be easier to push your arm down than to pull it up."

I looked at her, and slowly worked at getting to my feet. "I'm not done yet. When I beat you once, I'll be satisfied for the moment. I'll keep beating you down 'til I'm the expert," I growled.

I screamed, and ran at her with a battle cry. Raising my blade, I jumped in the air and prepared to bring it down on her. Mikasa looked taken by surprise, but raised her sword. I slammed down on her with all my force, and began to push. If I could back her against something, even the tree a few feet away—I could take her down. Another cry ripped from my core, and I felt my blood pound. I took a step forward, and Mikasa took one back. I almost got to the tree, but she raised her leg and put it behind mine, then taking a step back. It tripped me, and the air escaped from my lungs when I hit the cobblestones again.

"Almost. But now you're using too much force. You need to be on the defensive; don't assume that you're completely covered when you're attacking and the other person is trying to protect themselves," she said.

I sighed, and ran a hand through my sweaty hair, trying to free it from being plastered to my neck. I undid the elastic at the bottom, readjusting the braid that I'd had for the past few weeks. While I did it, I took a breather and looked at Eren, or preferably, his tiny silhouette standing on the wall at least three hundred feet away. I finished the braid, and stood back up. My thighs protested, but I wasn't going to give up. I was stubborn.

"Ready?" Mikasa asked, and I nodded.

She ran at me, and swung to cleave my head off my shoulders. I barely put my blade up in time, with a grunt. When my right arm was occupied, I tried to trip her with a kick but Mikasa leapt back. I swung wide, but she ducked and charged from below. With nothing but luck, I lashed out with my leg and my foot connected with her jaw. She went rolling to the side, but did a round-off and was back on her feet, like a black cat. I rocketed forwards again, my blade slamming against hers like before. She grunted, and I continued to press, but Mikasa managed to make me take a step back.

"Fight! Fight me back, Jennika!" she yelled. "Take out your anger towards me!"

My determined look fell, and my grip on the hilt loosened. "Huh?"

She shoved me and I nearly fell back, but I regained my footing and got back on the defensive. What was Mikasa talking about? I wasn't angry her at all! Why would I be?

Mikasa swung for a left hook, and I dodged left. It missed, and I went for an uppercut, but my knuckles connected with the smooth and hard metal of her blade. I mumbled profanities, and she launched again. "Take out your anger!" she shouted again, "All your anger towards me, for hurting you! Your pain is my fault, and I know you're mad at me! Channel it into your fighting!"

I nearly pressed my face to hers, our blades locked together again. "What are you talking about? I'm not angry at you!"

Her fist snapped my neck to the side when I was unprepared, and I hit the ground, seeing stars. She stood above me, and I rubbed the blood from the cut on my lip with my sleeve. "I'm not mad at you. What you did was an accident, and you had good intentions. It was a freak accident."

Mikasa gazed at me, her pitch eyes hollow and emotionless.

"I'm sorry, Mikasa, but I'm not really cut out for fighting. I'm trying all that I can, and I know you're getting frustrated," I murmured.

She sighed, and lowered her blade. "Don't be so soft. If you are, then anyone will beat you. Expect the unexpected," Mikasa said, and flipped her blade in her hand. "We'll try again tomorrow."

Turning, she started to walk out of the courtyard. I growled under my breath, and thrusted myself off the ground. Getting to my feet, I ran at Mikasa's back. I wasn't done yet. We weren't done until I said so.

I swung again, and stopped my blade an inch from her neck. She halted, and didn't move. "Expect the unexpected," I snarled.

Mikasa's head turned to the side, and I saw her eyes widen as I completed a roundhouse kick. Her feet flew out from under her, and she hit the ground with a satisfying thump. I jumped on her, and held my blade to her throat with less than a centimeter to spare. Her eyes widened, and she punched my arm. My hand lost grip, and the blade went skidding across the stone eight feet away. We both looked at it, and a new objective came to mind for each of us.

I raised my hand, and went to punch her face. She dodged, and it slammed into rock. Mikasa used the chance to her advantage, and flipped us over so that I was on the bottom. With a grunt, I kneed her in the stomach. She coughed, and I grabbed her shoulders and flipped her down. My hand reached out for the blade, but she wrapped her legs around my waist and rolled over, pulling me under her again. I grabbed her shoulders, and thrust her face down.

My forehead smashed into Mikasa's, and we were both in a daze for a moment. I saw it in the old Bruce Lee movies, so I thought I could so it too. Definitely not. We tried to clear our thoughts, and I got up, kicking her off me. I jumped for blade, but she grabbed my feet and sent me plummeting into the rocks. After I thought for sure that my nose was broken, I rolled onto my back.

Mikasa held my legs, but I managed to get one free and kick her in the chin. Her neck snapped up, and I jumped on top of her again. Her body was little taller than mine, but I managed to keep her down for the most part.

I held her shirt in closed fists, and she held mine, both of us grinding our jaws in determination.

"Uh... Jennika? Mikasa?"

We both looked to our right, to see Eren and Armin staring at us in the entrance to the courtyard. Both of their faces were beet red, and they looked over our position.

On top of each other, wrestling with each other's shirts, our chests tightly pressing against each other, and our legs tangled in a heap on the ground.

"A-ah, it's n-not what it looks like!" Mikasa and I yelled at the same time, and scrambled to get up, but only fell on each other again. Our noses nearly touched, and we struggled to push ourselves away.

We looked back at the guys, to see Armin holding his heavily-bleeding nose, and Eren's face an even darker shade of crimson.

"You have it wrong!" we screeched.

"I-I need to go!" Armin announced, and ran down the halls into the castle, clutching his bleeding nose.

"I c-can talk later, when you're not b-busy!" Eren said, and turned around to sprint in the other direction.

"H-Hey!" I yelled. I pushed myself off of Mikasa, who was just as relieved as me to be out of that embarrassing position. "Get back here!" I screeched, "I need someone to practice my throws on!"

I continued yelling at them as I chased them down the halls, Mikasa following straight behind me.



Dinner that night was awkward, to say the least. Especially after what happened between Mikasa and I, and how it appeared to them. Stupid perverts.

We ate in silence, and I picked at my mashed potatoes. Armin found a little bit of the garden that hadn't been destroyed by winter, so he prepared them. As much as a nice change that it was, I only swished them around my plate, my head resting in my hand. When I finally just decided that I had no appetite, I stood up.

"Guys, look, I'm sorry that I suck at learning, but I am trying my hardest!" I said.

Eren swallowed, and looked at me with his green eyes. "We know, Jennika. We know that you're trying. Look how far it's gotten you."

"Yeah," Armin added, "you passed the tests I gave you. And you beat me in races with 3D Maneuver Gear."

"You just need to practice fighting," Mikasa said, "But you have more than enough perseverance."

I smiled a bit, and sat down. Speaking of that, Armin, get up for a moment."

"Eh?" he said, but stood up anyways. I walked to the boy's side of the table, and looked at him.

Skinny build, fair muscles under his jacket, and just an inch taller than me. With a grin, I grabbed his right arm with my left, and whipped around, crunching my body forward.

"WAH!" he screamed as he flew over my shoulder, into the stone floor with a crunch.

"Expect the unexpected." I smirked.

For a moment, I saw a ghost of a smile on Mikasa's face, before she took another spoonful of potato.

Eren got up and helped up Armin, and shot Mikasa a look. "I thought you said she sucked at fighting!"

"Hey!" I glared at Mikasa, who stood abruptly.

"I'm going to eat this somewhere else," she stated, and began walking away with her plate.

"Get back here!" I yelled, and ran after her. She dropped her plate, and sprinted down the hall. "I tried!"

Behind me was Eren, who was struggling to subdue me and prevent Mikasa from losing her arm. Armin was right behind him, trying to run with his stiff back.

"Save it for later, guys! We have two weeks left!" he yelled.

Soon, we all ran out of breath, and when I caught up to Mikasa, I gently punched her shoulder, and she laughed lightly. We were hunched over in the courtyard, in the middle of the night. I saw Armin stop by me, huffing and puffing like there was no tomorrow.

"Watch out!" Eren yelled, and barreled into me.

We both slammed into the ground, and laid on the stone. Mikasa and Armin collapsed as well, and we all stared up at the night sky. Our arms spread out, our chests heaving, we lost all trains of thought and looked at the midnight sky.

"Two weeks," I muttered, "That's just enough time."