Silver Linings

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen

"Jamie, I don't think you should propose, not right now," Frank replied. "She's just been through a terrible shock. A horrible shock and now is not the time..."

"Oh I know, I know," Jamie replied. "I just mean I've made the decision that I love Eddie and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. If we could get through this stuff and stay together, we can make it through everything."

Frank agreed that was probably true. "Well, you should try to get some rest while you can. We have no idea if remembering will cause her nightmares."

Jamie drank a second whiskey then headed to bed. He was surprised to find Eddie was awake just staring up at the ceiling. "Hey," he whispered softly.

"Hey," Eddie said smiling a little. "I was going to come out, but I heard you talking to your father. I know tonight wasn't easy on you either."

Jamie joined Eddie on the bed, "No, seeing you go through that was not easy at all. Still, I was glad I was there to support you, to take care of you. There was no place I'd have preferred to be."

Eddie reached out for Jamie's hand, "There's one part that I still don't understand. Why are you in the nightmare, Jamie? Why do I see you looming over us?"

"Well, that's a question for the doctor more than me, but I think maybe your subconscious was scared I would judge you, or think it was your fault. And it was not your fault, you did nothing wrong, you do believe that right?"

Eddie nodded, "I've been with enough victims to know that. It was their fault, but Jamie I don't think I can walk back in the precinct and face Casey after what he did to me. Charges are no longer an option but..."

Jamie kissed her head, "My father took care of that. As of yesterday, Thomas Casey was transferred to East Harlem, he won't be around the 12th anymore at all. I will have my say in that too. He will not get away with this; he will know that I know what he's done."

Jamie's jaw set firmly and Eddie traced it with her thumb. "Don't... don't be angry. It doesn't suit you."

"He raped you Eddie," Jamie sighed. "He raped you and I can't let him get away with it. Not with the woman I love. I love you, Eddie."

"I love you," Eddie said firmly kissing his lips softly. "I need you to do something for me. Can you fill in the blanks? From what my father said?"

"You basically remembered all you can," Jamie replied moving so he could put his arms around her. "He said that you were found unconscious by a custodian at the school and he called 911 and found out who you were to call your folks. When he smashed your head you had some swelling and fell into a coma. You were that way for about a week and when you came to..." Jamie sighed thinking of his Eddie lying there helpless in a hospital bed. "You were disoriented and had healed from the attack so they wanted to spare you the pain when you didn't seem to remember."

Eddie shut her eyes, "I guess they were just trying to protect me and it would have worked too if he never came to the 12th. Jamie... I need to see... I have to ask you to kiss me and touch me, I have to know if this memory will make it so I can't..."

Jamie cut her off with a soft kiss to her lips. He cupped her head in his hands and stroked her cheek with his thumb. "That's all I want to do tonight," he murmured. "When we make love I want it to be about us, not about this. Never about this. If you can't for a while, that is fine with me. I will still love you and I will be as patient as you need me to be." To reaffirm his love for her he kissed her deeply.

Eddie fell asleep snuggled in Jamie's arms. She slept peacefully the rest of the night as if her pain and fear had been washed away. She woke still feel tired and stiff. Jamie was still beside her, but she could hear Frank moving around in the other part of the suite. She slid out of bed and padded to the kitchen for a cup of coffee.

"Good morning," Eddie greeted smiling. "Coffee smells good." It was awkward now knowing he'd been there when she had remembered her assault. "I uh, just wanted to say thank you for being there last night for me and Jamie. You helped me remember, now I can get along with my life."

"I'd love to say it was my pleasure, but no one should have to go through what you did," Frank said gently. "Have a cup of coffee, take one into Jamie. You two enjoy today together. I have to drive back to Brooklyn."

"What about family dinner?" Eddie asked. "We're excused?"

"You can be excused yes," Frank replied. "I think you need the time to get your head back on straight. This is not going to be easy, but know we are all here for you Eddie."

"Thank you, Frank," she replied softly. "I think we'll take you up on that if it's okay with Jamie." Eddie took two cups of coffee into the bedroom area. Jamie was just starting to wake up.

"Hey sleepy head," Eddie greeted offering him a cup of coffee. "I was just talking to your dad, and he suggested we stay on another day. What do you think?"

"Dad is letting us out of family dinner?" Jamie asked and Eddie nodded.

"Yes, he thinks we need some time to regroup and spend time together. I thought maybe we could go for a drive, have a nice dinner, and just enjoy one another." Eddie sipped her coffee and crossed her legs.

"Yes," Jamie replied kissing her temple. "I think we do need this time to cope and regroup."

"Next week we'll go to dinner," Eddie promised. "I know how much you enjoy it."

"Don't you?" Jamie asked wondering now if he had been forcing his family on her.

"Oh yes, but sometimes it's nice to be alone with you too," she replied. "Like now. I feel dirty and violated, I feel angry but I also feel such relief that I finally know."

"I do too, I'm relieved you know that we can face this together. I know it had to be so hard for you Eddie, but it was hard on me to watch you suffering and not be able to help you."

"You have helped me more than you could even know," Eddie whispered kissing his cheek. "Now we start to heal together. You went through this Hell with me and we'll get out of this together too."

When their coffee was done they decided to go to the diner for a late breakfast then a walk. Jamie watched Eddie for signs of trauma but found none. She was acting like the old Eddie before all of this happened. As they held hands and strolled around the little antique shops Jamie thought about their future and his father's words. Still he decided to feel it out.

"Eddie, did you ever think about how you'd like to decorate a house?" Jamie asked.

"Yeah, classic and modern," Eddie replied. "Sort of like my place now. Big comfy furniture, but modern twists..."

Jamie smiled, "I like that, too. I think you have great taste Eddie. I love the woman's touch you brought to my place. I really want to see that touch a lot more often." He blushed and hoped she reacted well.

"You will, Reagan," Eddie promised. "I have no doubt that you will."