From the 2nd Year

IV

Fast forward a couple months. Our squad was complete and we were having the time of our lives- or at least it seemed. My buddies were great, my grades were awesome, and school lunch still sucked. My new friends were freshmen named Zeke, Roy, and Sydney. The sophomores were Xavier, Genesis and myself, and the oldest was Logan- the junior.

Once I had my custom group of friends in P.E. I stopped hanging out with my old 'nerdy' group- the introverted, anime watching, and artistically gifted friends. I felt bad because I was no longer hanging out with Mandy and the only time I saw her was in photojournalism. Granted, we had a lot of time to go outside of the classroom and take photos together, it just wasn't the same, but she still trusted me the most out of her friends. And it's not like I just left her- God no! She was getting involved with these shady boys and I hadn't even my first boyfriend yet, but every time Mandy got in a new relationship, she disconnected herself from the rest of the world.

It was frustrating for me at times because I would offer her (what I thought was) good relationship advice and she would blow me off and get her heartbroken. Like the time she was with a skater boy. Holy shit, don't even get me started.  She was having internal conflict- no doubt- because she was currently "on a break" with this other guy. Who may I add, was a senior and not going to graduate that year. He was so gross, like his hair was long and greasy, he was short, his hands were stubby, and always wore fucking cowboy boots. Did I mention he also wore glasses and his clothes looked dirty all the time? So many things wrong with that boy... What was Mandy thinking?

One time when we were at lunch, he put his wallet on the table and my friend had commented on the ring shaped object inside it... It was a condom. This guy was already gross to begin with, but associating him with that object is just revolting. Someone tell me, who the hell puts a condom in their wallet?! There best be a better spot for that thing to go. What made it worse was that Mandy and I were chatting about it later and she had mentioned how he told her that, "He's always prepared."

... I should bleach myself just thinking about it, but I couldn't have been happier when they finally broke up. The problem was, when Mandy broke up with that guy, she got with the next one waiting in line. She had too much going on at once at all times- she had two boys she was flirting with in real life while at the same time she was in a long distance relationship with this other boy... She was self destructive in that manner. Her plate was always too full and I didn't understand why.

She was pretty, but she wasn't that pretty; she was goofy! I just couldn't figure out how she could have so many guys and be so unpopular. It was mind boggling.

Despite her boy problems and my jealousy, I was still a really happy kid. In fact I was so happy that I had turned into a laughing goofball. No joke! So, allow me to get into the real story and get past all of this character development bullshit.

It was about a month and a half before my 16th birthday and I was excited about it. Due to my enthusiasm, I was more of a goofball than I would normal be. And one faithful afternoon in P.E. I was on a walk with with my new found friend Genesis and we were talking 'boys'.

"How are you and Justin?" I asked.
"We're doing pretty good," she answered. "Our 6 month is coming up."
"Oh! Congratulations," I exclaimed. "Are you two doing anything special?"
"I think he's planning on taking me to diner," She replied.

This talk continued for a while, until we started talking about previous relationships.

"Tell me about the guys you've been with," Genesis said like an older sister would.
"Well," I said with embarrassment. "I've never had a boyfriend."
"Really? You just seem like you'd have some boys under your belt," She stated.
"Nope, not yet." I said with disappointment.
"Don't worry," She said with relief. "The right guy will come along."
"You're probably right," I said. "Although, I have been in relationships where we seemed like we were dating, but were never declared a thing."
"Oh yeah, I know what you mean." Genesis said.
"Do you know Bryan?" I asked her.
"Bryan?" She thought for a second, "I don't think so."
"Well, anyway, him and I were super crushing on each other in 8th grade," I explained. "We were supposed to go to different high schools, but ended up going to the same high school," I went on, "He's in color guard now, so I don't get to talk to him because he has new friends."
"Wait... Do you mean, that Bryan?" She questioned. "REALLY?!"

I laughed so loud because she was so shocked! Bryan was Hispanic and had really nice hair and he was a bit shorter, but fit. He was also super charismatic, but in middle school we were in band together, played the same instrument, and even had a couple of classes together. Eventually we started hanging out and I became a part of his group of his closest friends that later became my closest friends.

He and I were on bestie status- to the point where he would come over to my house sometimes. Now please understand that my parents were not going to let just any boy come into our house. They were very particular people, especially since my parents are a lesbian couple. That's beside the point, but after awhile Bryan and I developed 'skinship ' between each other and then we both confessed our attractions for one another, although nothing became of it. I was heartbroken because I wanted more and he didn't. It was the first time I made an attempt at a relationship and I got rejected. What made it even worse was that following summer when he confessed to me that he had an attraction for boys...

Other than that experience I had no clue about relationships, but always offered everyone else advice. It was a strange dynamic.