Caught in the Middle

Chapter 12

I held my breath as something inside me screamed that I already should have known that these handsome men at some point intermingled with women.  They were wealthy, living a bachelor's life alone.  Of course, they would go out and have fun and bring a woman back with them to their place. I was just another woman.

But why did my heart feel as heavy as a bowling ball?  I lowered my eyelashes to veil the hurt.  There was a sudden sting in my eyes and I buried my hands beneath my thighs. 

"Her name?" Were the only two words that left my mouth.

"Elisa Vann," he simply said the name but the current undertone of affection was there.

"Did you love her?"  I asked.

He glanced at me and I cursed myself for the obvious distress he saw in my reaction.

"I did."  And his words lifted the weight in me.  I was breathing clearly.  It almost felt as if I ran a marathon.

"What happened to her and both you and Nathan?"

He shifted the way he was driving his vehicle.  He used one hand to grip the steering wheel while his other hand clutched the gear.  "Nathan or Nathaniel is what I used to call him," he too called Mr. Pierce by his first name.  "We were in our third year of college when we met her.  It was a party on campus when she was introduced to us by her sorority.  She was double majoring in business and fashion.  She charmed us both at the time. Eventually we became a click of three -really good friends."

"Yes," I said, encouraging him to continue.

"The three of us became really close.  Nathaniel use to find all the parties for us to attend.  I use to find the places for us to have dinner since we grew tired of eating the cafeteria food or we didn't want to cook.  Elisa," he paused and smiled affectionately.  I didn't like the far away look he had on his face.

"Elisa, what?" I said a bit too harshly to bring him back into reality.  I frowned at how I was acting like some jealous bitch.  Dane didn't notice.

"Elisa was spoiled.  She didn't have to pay her for own meals.  We bought her craft supplies for her fashion classes.  Sometimes we bought her clothes for the big parties that we attended on campus.  And she took everything with a smile.  She was always full of smiles."

I wanted to include she was a free loader too but I held my tongue.

"We planned our spring break in Lake George, when got the sudden news that she couldn't go.  I was okay with it but not Nathaniel.  He insisted that she go with us."  Dane's voice was fading.  I craned my neck to see a shimmer in his blue eyes and it had nothing to do with the headlights from other cars.

Something good didn't happen.  As if Dane read my mind, he revealed it.  "Nathaniel went to check up on her at her family's home when they mentioned she never returned home for spring break.  She was at Roosevelt Hospital to check up on her treatments for cancer."

My eyes widened with the news.  "Elisa had cancer?"

"Yes. Leukemia. Her family wanted her to live a normal life before she moved on...."

A tear slipped from his eyes and I looked the opposite way.  A gray 2008 Honda Sonata was driving at the same speed as us on Roosevelt Highway.

"She couldn't attend classes after and Nathaniel chose to stay with her at the hospital.  As I was the foolish one who continued to go classes regularly.  And right before she passed away, Nathaniel came to me to return with him to the hospital to see her one last time.  I refused to go...."  His voice cracked.

"You don't have to tell me anymore," I said.  I could figure the rest of his sad story.

"It's my fault she died or at least that's what Nathaniel says.  He never forgave me for her death, which is why he hates me."

"It's not your fault.  She was sick," I said while I finally looked at him.  A man like Dane should never cry.  His usual stolid face contorted into one of sadness as his shoulder hunched over.

"I didn't go to her funeral," he confessed.

"It's alright," I said, feeling moisture gather in my eyes.

"And what makes everything worse was the fact she loved me more than him," he said.  I couldn't find the words to make him feel better as his words hit me straight in my heart.