Dude's A Lady?

Chapter Thirty Seven

I didn't go after him, after Ty left. I didn't have the right to chase after him. I had hurt him and he needed space.

I could understand that.

Afterwards, I called Sawyer up and had him come pick me up. The ride home was a silent and tense one. I let the indie music station fill in the empty spaces in the car. Nothing could be said to make this feeling going away.

Gingerly, I touched my bottom lip and remembered how it felt when he kissed me. The way it seemed so sweet and long awaited. Like we were craving for it and we had finally caved into the temptation. Tyson liked me, he really liked me.

At least he did, before I dropped the 'my heart is a hoe' bomb.

Then I remembered the way my stomach screwed up in knots when he stormed out. It was like watching his whole demeanor change. He wasn't just Tyson anymore. He was more than that and I had lost him.

"I told him." I said without preamble.

"I figured." Sawyer replied without missing a beat, "I'm guessing you told him about Blake too?" he raised his eyebrow, briefly looking over to me before his eyes trained on the road again.

"How do you know about him too?" I furrowed my brows.

"We have twin powers." He answered simply. I scoffed and stared at him flatly. "It also helped that Sophia told me." he added sheepishly.

"Knew she would tell you eventually." I shrugged, "Sawyer? What did you do when you had to choose between Soph and Nicky?" I asked, hoping he would give me a clear answer.

He had been in similar shoes, not long ago. However, his choice seemed pretty obvious. A blind man in China with no sense of direction could clearly see that Sophia had my brothers heart.

But maybe, just maybe Sawyer had his doubts. They say love can make the most level headed people foggy in the head. What if I was foggy? What if what I saw in each of the boys was just an idea, and not the real thing?

Falling in love with an idea was only falling into a trap. I didn't want to be trapped.

"I looked at each of them. I really had to look at them and find something that the other didn't have. Then I tried to see myself living without both of them. I couldn't see myself living without Soph." he answered as if that easy enough. I narrowed my eyes at him skeptically.

"But you had only known Soph for a few months. Nicky had been around for years. Didn't that freak you out? Loving someone in such a short amount of time?" I asked.

"Well, you see, I thought the same way you're thinking right now. But then I had to remind myself that love can not be measured in time, it can't be measured in space. Love can't be measured by quantity of any sorts. Love is this huge mass that embodies your heart and soul. It's the butterflies, the fireworks, the ache in your heart when you say goodbye." he said with a goofy grin on his lips, as we drove through the dark winding streets to our house. I closed my eyes and relaxed in my seat, as I let the lyrics of the song playing fill in the quiet of the car.

There was no need to respond.

***

"Aren't you going to finish eating Vivi?" Mom asked with a subtle worried glance at my almost full plate. I shook my head and pushed it away, not at all feeling my appetite.

"Can I go up to room and sleep?" I asked softly. Mom frowned, but nodded sympathetically. I passed by Sawyer who froze mid chew to pat my head.

"There, there problematic little sister." He muffled through a mouth a full of food, "They'll both see you're not all that and a bag of chips."