Two Stars- An Auslly Fanfiction

Chapter 23

I tell my family I don't want to go to school in the morning. I tell Susan I must be sick, when she asks, semi-concerned. In a way, I am.

So throughout the day, home alone, I spend my time sleeping, playing my guitar, trying not to get carried away like yesterday. Now, I sit on my bed, trying to distract myself with my history homework, though I'd rather just rip it all up. I am literally about to just call it quits and throw it out the window, when Avery walks into my room.

"Aw, you really are the sickest little thing..." she says sarcastically.

"How did you get into this house? And This morning I wasn't feeling very well."

"Ha-ha. Cute. Oh, there's a key under the welcome mat by the front door. No but really, what happened to you?" I shrug.

"Just wasn't in the mood to go to school.

"Yes, Ally, we've established that. Now why?" That's the thing about Avery. She's pushy. Almost annoyingly so. 

"Avery...just...look, Sonali is really angry with my right now, I thought it best to give her some time," I quickly come up with a (sort-of) honest excuse. She seems satisfied by it; at least she doesn't press further. 

"Right. I- she and Austin have some problems with one another. But she's not mad at you, she's just upset in general. Also-" she cuts herself off, I'm guessing because she notices the way I'm staring at her shirt. I mean, I was listening, but my attention, my thoughts, have travelled. 

It's the beach, her shirt. Sandy shores, palm trees, and the water. Suddenly, I remember full-on why I wasn't at school. I continue to stare, but I'm not really staring, because in my mind, I ses something else.; I see the darkness of the day before. And then Avery waves her hand on front of my face. 

"Ally!" I blink. "God, I'm about to give you this long philosophical speech and you blank out on me like that."

"Sorry, I just...so...you like the ocean?" I ask weakly. Avery laughs out loud, and I give her an odd look.

"I'll tell you something, Ally. I'm afraid of the ocean. I mean, it's not a total phobia that I have...I jst fear them more than I enjoy their existence. The death rate in oceans around the world is like...nine a day! I don't wanna be one of those people."

"I almost was..."

"What?"

"Never mind."

"I really don't understand you sometimes, Ally D.," she teases, but I know she heard me; I've made her nervous. 

"I know," I reply anyways. Only one person does. 

"Hokay. Anyways. As I was saying before you got all weird on me... Basically, you can't run away from your problems. Example: when I was in sixth grade, I stayed home 'sick,' just to avoid running two miles in P.E. But then I just had to make it up the next day. Even worse for me, I had to do it while everyone else got to do the fun stuff. Bottom line: You can't get away from the things you just hide away on a really high shelf. Eventually, they're gonna fall right back down in your path."

She's good at giving advice. Except right now, she's giving the wrong advice, assuming something else is wrong with me. I know I can trust her, I could tell her what my real problem is, and she'd help and support me. 

Here's the thing: One, I think if I tell her what I tried yesterday, she'd think less of me. She seems like the kind of person who'd hate anyone against living. Also, I don't really have another way I can say what I need help with. I don't know what's wrong with me.