We live in a world consumed by media, this is what your suppose to look like.... A thin model, thigh gap, small waist, flat stomach, hip bone and collar bones... You stare at your reflection your none of those, your not pretty or skinny enough, you...
I had gym today, let's say upper body strength isn't my thing, I'm the only girl in it, I was partnered with a guy, him and all his mates made comments about him and few of me, I saw one of his mates taking a photo or maybe video of us.... Let's say I had to do skip rope and let's say sports bra don't always give you the correct padding #bouncyboobs. I had to do shuttle runs and I almost slipped 😂.
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My fall was majestic I think
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Moving onto another topic, my best friend opened up to me I'll give you a false name which she will go by (Kat) so Kat and I had art, we talked about how school was draining on second day back and how much we hated it, she started to open up saying "I'm going to get depressed again" I replied to saying "I know how you feel, I've been like that lately, I'm missing my pop". She said to me "I'm going to cut again" I look at her with my eyes watering "don't say that your going to make me cry, it's hurts to hear and see them, Gab (another false name of a girl I know) does it and it hurts, where do you put them?" I ask "on my thighs and stomach" I looked at her "Its hard, no one does it for attention, people hurt, depression isn't something fun to have, pain doesn't stop, for some cutting is a relief" I say.
I was so close to telling her about developing an eating disorder and I don't want her to think, why aren't you skinny yet. It's so pathetic I'm pathetic.
