Why me? (MCR)

Chapter 44

December 24, 2001
Gerard
The next morning was brought by the sun in my eyes and a headache. I frowned, knowing that I wasn't drinking anymore. And that no one there would spike my drink. So I need to chill the fuck out and remember that this happens sometimes when I'm really tired when I fall asleep.

I mentally face palmed at myself, muttering 'idiot' under my breath. I turned to my side and seen Jade was still asleep. I leaned down and kissed the top of her head and carefully got out of bed. It was 10:15 now, so I stayed up.

I went downstairs quietly, trying not to fall in the dark. I flipped on the lights when I finally got to the kitchen. I went straight to the coffeemaker and waited very impatiently for it to be done. When it finally beeped, I hastily grabbed the handle so it wouldn't wake up anyone else.

I finished it off in under 15 minutes and I felt slightly more awake. Before I poured myself another, I heard Amber whimpering upstairs.

I set my cup down on the table and went upstairs to do the best job in the world. When I got into her room, she was just about to start crying so I flipped on the light and went over to her crib.

I picked her up into my arms gently and went over to the changing table. I laid her down and turned to pick out an outfit for her right quick. I turned back to her and changed her diaper quickly, almost gagging. But hey, this is part of my favourite job. But I never said I liked changing diapers. Ugh. I got her cleaned up and changed into a clean one before I got her into her little black leggings with a sparkly black tutu.

I also picked out a dark red shirt to go with it. I pulled it carefully over her head and helped her get her arms through the sleeves. When I finished with that, I stepped back and smiled.

I left her hair as it was for the moment before I took her downstairs to feed her. Amber had finally moved on to baby food, which is why I was grabbing a little jar of orange looking yuckiness out of the cupboard (if it's supposed to be in the fridge, then.... Yeah). Well, it looked yucky to me.

I opened it and grabbed a little 'baby spoon.' Surprisingly, she ate every bite of it without a problem. Usually she kicks up a small fuss.

Once she was finished with that, I threw the jar into the recycling bin that we kept outside and the spoon in the sink. I got Amber out of her high chair and went back upstairs.

I put the detangler in her hair and brushed through it slowly, not wanting to get the brush caught on any knots and hurt her. When that was over with, I just left it down until Jade decided to fool with it. I went into our room and set Amber on the bed carefully, noting that Jade was in the bathroom showering.

I'd showered last night, so I went ahead and got dressed with my back to Amber. No, I'm not neglecting her or showing her anything she shouldn't see. I just don't like dressing in front of others... Even my own family. But she's my daughter so....

Anyway, I wore a black shirt and black skinny jeans. Even though this is gonna sound weird, I put on the bulletproof vest, and bam! It's complete. Well, other than my black Chuck Taylor's, but those can wait.

By the time I was done, I returned to Amber and ran my hands through my messy black hair. Ugh, there's a lot of black for a cheery holiday. I sighed and stood again, taking off the best and the black shirt and grabbing a dark grey one. "There, that's better," I mumbled, walking back to Amber-lulu. I looked at us in the mirror and smiled.

She looked so adorable in her Christmas outfit!! I actually thought I looked decent for once. Then I seen Jade walking out behind me with black leggings and a blue dress.