Always

5

FOR ANYONE WHO IS CONFUSED: GRACE IS NOT SHAWN'S CHILD. BEY WAS PULLED OUT OF SCHOOL WHEN SHE WAS 14 AND THAT'S WHEN SHE BEGAN SNEAKING OUT AT NIGHT AND MET THE GUY WHO FATHERED HER CHILD. HE WILL BE IN THE BOOK LATER. SHE WAS NOT ALLOWED TO TALK TO SHAWN AFTER SHE WAS PULLED OUT OF SCHOOL (SHE WENT TO THE SAME BOARDING SCHOOL AS HE DID) AND THEN SHE NEVER SPOKE TO HIM AGAIN. 

"Tell me, Bumble Bee" Shawn and Beyoncé sat on the freshly cut grass of the school field on a blue blanket with candy scattered around them as they sat facing each other with their legs crossed. The 6 year old Beyoncé leaned forward and huffed as her head fell into her hands. "Why don't you want to go home this summer?" He asked her, 

"I don't want to talk about it" She replied with a glum look. He picked up some candy and shoved it in his small mouth before laying back and looking up at the sky. 

"What if I tell you about my home?" He asked her, she crawled over to him and laid beside him garbing some candy and placing it in her mouth. She looked up at him as he looked down at her while the two of them laid beside each other. "My mom works in an old peoples home as a nurse, It's just me and mom since my dad left us. We don't have a lot of money and we live in a one bedroom apartment in New York with rats and all sorts, my grandma is paying for me to come to this school because it means that while I'm here I don't need to worry about where my next meal will come from or being shot because we don't live in a good neighbourhood. My grandma says she wants me to have a great future so that I won't live like this forever, that's why I go here" The young girl instantly felt bad for sitting and complaining about going home for the past few days. She was only 6 but she was very mature and could understand that her problems didn't compare to Shawn's at all. She had both parents and far more money than what they knew to do with and she didn't have any financial problems at all but she still had difficulties. 

"My mom get's angry at me a lot, whenever I do anything I like she get's angry at me. She doesn't like fictional books, or art, or performance or anything that I like at all and so when I do these things she gets Carmen to beat me and I have to stay in the attic." She began, he looked down at her with wide eyes, "I'm not allowed to attend any events unless my appearance is required and even then I'm barely allowed to talk; everything is all about image and being formal. I have to wear at least three different outfits a day and my father keeps telling me that I need to be a lawyer or something" Shawn wrapped his arm around her and pulled her into him. "I don't like talking about it, I like being here with you so let's not spoil it." She tucked her head into his chest and he nodded sadly wondering what he could possibly do to help her, 

"I won't ask again" He agreed, she nodded and looked up at the sky. Shawn never did ask again, not that Beyoncé would have replied anyway. She had learned to keep her school life and personal life very separate, she was very secretive with what happened at home and no one in school really knew anything about her life outside of school the same way that no one outside of school knew anything about school at all. Shawn was the only exception, he became a big part of he life growing up and every now and then she'd complain about going home for the holidays but he never went as far as to ask why because he knew she'd feel bad, he knew she'd hate the conversation the way she had the first time and he couldn't bring himself to force her to talk about something she so desperately tried to forget.  It was obvious to him that she liked to create a new world for herself at school away from all her troubles and he was too young to even think about breaking it. He knew her from when she was 5 until she was 14. In the majority of those years he didn't really understand the importance of confiding in a friend when the young Beyoncé relied so heavily on her performance as a form of expression. It wasn't until he was 11 that he started to question the health behind keeping it all bottle up but even then she meant far too much to him for him to hurt her on purpose. In some ways he was right but in others he was terribly wrong.