Love Without End

Chapter Forty Six

"You know what you guys need?" Angela asked Tony and me.
"A boat?" Tony asked.
"Yes." Imani said.
"No." Angela rolled her eyes. "You guys need a date night."
"Tony and Amy, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G--" Sam began. He shut up when I elbowed him in the ribs.
"And a boat?" Tony asked.
"Why do we need a boat?" I asked.
"Why don't we need a boat?" He said, like it was obvious. Poor Bruce was walking in just then, and Tony chose him as his target. "Hey, Bruce. Don't you think we need a boat?"
"Sure, Tony." Bruce said like he didn't care, like he did every time Tony did stuff like that.
Tony pointed at him. "Bruce gets it. It's settled."
"We aren't getting a boat." I sighed.
"Fine. I'll convince you over date night. I'll go prepare my persuasive essay." He got up and walked out.
"Good!" Angela clapped her hands. "I'll do your hair and make up. And pick your clothes."
"We'll take Angela and Imani out." Bucky suggested.
"Where do you guys wanna go?" Sam asked the kids.
"What are we talking about?" Bruce asked.
"Can we go visit Uncle Clint?" Angela asked.
"Ask him."

A few hours later, Angela pulled me out of the living room and up to hers. "What are we doing?" I asked.
"We're getting you ready."
"It's gonna take an hour?"
"Yes."
I let her curl my hair and do my make up. She was right about it taking an hour. She didn't finish for forty something minutes. Then she pulled out a shirt. "Put this on."
"Where are the pants?"
"It's a dress."
"That's not a dress."
"Put it on, Mother."
I put it on, and it wasn't as short as I'd thought. "I don't know." I said. I guess it's decent, but it's not exactly what I'm used to.
"Oh, come on, Mom. You may be old, but you aren't dead yet."
"You're out of the will." I laughed.
"I've been out."
"Hey, Mom?" She asked quietly as we were about to leave the room. "What did you tell me when I asked?"
"What did I tell you when you asked what?"
"When I asked about your scars?"
"You didn't ask me. You asked your father."
"What did Dad tell me?"
"I don't know. He never told me."
"I know what he told me. What would you have told me?"
"Why do you ask?"
"I don't know. It just seems weird that I've never heard it from you."
"Okay. Well, what age am I supposed to be thinking of you as?"
"Why?"
"Well, I wouldn't tell a six-year-old the same thing I'd tell a teenager."
"What would you tell me now, then?"
"That I messed up and did something stupid, and that I regret it more than anything."
"What else do you regret?"
"Nothing." I regret killing Steve.
"You don't regret anything?"
"Nope. If I hadn't done the things I did, I wouldn't be where I am now." If I hadn't done that, we could have done something else.
"And you're happy now?"
"Yes." No.
"All right. Let's go, then." She smiled.
"Can I change?"
"No."
"Can I get a jacket?"
"Mom, did you cut on your thighs too?"
"Yes." Short and sweet. I repeated in my head. If I kept my answers short and sweet, maybe she'd stop asking.
"Why were you so unhappy?"
"I don't know." I said.
"You don't know?"
"No."
"Were you sad about your parents?"
"I did a lot of it before that happened."
"Why were you sad then?"
"I don't know. Honestly."
"Okay." She smiled again. "Come on, Dad'll be waiting." She opened the door and pulled me out.
Tony spit out what he was drinking all over Bruce when Angela and I walked in. "Tony!" I said, rushing for a paper towel.
"Seriously?" Bruce glared at Tony. "Amy, what the--" he began when he saw me.
"Language." Angela said before he finished.
"What are you drinking?" I demanded of Tony, shoving the towels at Bruce and picking up Tony's glass.
"Whiskey." He said weakly, spluttering.
"Why?" I snapped.
"He's been drinking it all day." Imani said.
"Oh, come on, Imani." Tony sighed. "Who's side are you on?"
I put the glass down and turned to every else, clapping my hands. "Well. We'll see you guys later, okay?"
"I need to change." Bruce said. "Your husband spit on me."
"Get a shirt at Clint's." I pulled him from his chair and pushed him out the door.
"Have fun, love birds!" Sam called as they filed out.
I turned to Tony. "All day?" I raised my eyebrows.
"Sorry, I--"
"I don't care that you drink in front of them, but I thought we had some rules."
"Yes, I know."
"You're supposed to show them how to act. You want them to think it's okay to drink all day?"
"I've been nervous, okay?"
"Why have you been nervous?"
"I hate Angela's little date nights. I stress out all day about them."
"Why?"
"Because of you! I never know what you'll be wearing, how you'll look. You always look stunning and I never know how to act or--"
"Act the same way you always act."
"I can never remember how I always act--"
Angela waltzed back in. "Redo. Mom, come on." She pulled me out.
"Redo?" I asked.
"Sam and Bucky were slacking. Hang on."
"Okay..?"
"Calm down a little, okay? Cut him some slack."
"What's the use of having rules if you don't follow them?"
"When I asked Daddy what the marks on your arm were, he told me that you did it because you were sad, so I asked why you were sad. He told me that he didn't know, but that you deserved better. I asked why you did it, because you were so pretty, and he said 'She's not pretty. She's beautiful. But I don't know.' I told him that I knew that he knew why, but he just wasn't telling me, and that I wanted to know, so he said, 'She didn't know she was beautiful, or that she deserved better.' I asked if you knew now, and he said, 'Well, I hope I've shown her' and told me you were the best thing that ever happened to him, besides me and Imani, and that you made him know that he deserved better. He's not trying to make you mad, Momma. He loves you so much that doing things like this stresses him out. And you are rockin' that dress, let me tell you." She ended with a smile.
"They're ready." Imani walked into the room. "You look beautiful, Mom." He kissed my cheek and continued on his way.
"Okay, okay, go." Angela grinned and followed Imani's lead.
I went back into the dining room. The table was set, and the plates were already prepared. My eyes found Tony. He was leaning against the doorway opposite me, wearing a tux, with a flower between his lips. Laughing, I backed out of the room.
"See you!" Sam and Bucky called as they ran out, but I couldn't respond for laughing so hard.
I went back into the dining room and Tony was laughing too.
Once we both calmed down, we sat down to dinner. I held out my hands, and he took them. "Thank you for this food, and for the people that prepared it. Please bless it to the nourishment of our bodies, and get them where they're going safely. In Jesus' name, amen." Tony said, and we started eating.
"You don't have to drink when you're stressed." I said quietly after a few minutes.
"What else am I supposed to do?"
"You normally work."
"My hands were shaking too much."
"You really need help for your anxiety, Tony. It's gotten worse."
"You need help for depression."
"I'm not depressed."
"I don't have anxiety."
We continued eating in silence.
"I love you, Tony." I said suddenly. "I love you so much. You're an amazing person."
"I know. What did I do?"
"Nothing. I just love you."
He smiled as he took a sip of his wine. "Should we get out the whiskey?" He asked.
"Sure. Wanna make sandwiches?" I asked. I'm not a fan of steak.
"Thought you'd never ask. You wanna make the sandwiches and I'll bring all this to those people down in the alley over there?" He asked as we both stood.
I hugged him, smiling. "Sounds amazing. What kind of sandwich do you want?"
"Can I have peanut butter and jelly?"
"Sure. Strawberry jelly?"
"Please."
"Coming right up."
He kissed my cheek. "I love you." He snatched up the plates and left.
"This is our little secret." I told JARVIS as I made the sandwiches.
"Yes ma'am."
I blew out the candles and put them away, and was about to pour whiskey when I decided that that didn't go with peanut butter and made chocolate milk instead. By then, Tony was back. "You and your grape jelly." He wrinkled his nose as he came behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. "No whiskey?"
"It doesn't go with peanut butter. I think you've had enough anyways."
"Okay." He turned his face into my neck.
"See, now this isn't so bad, is it?" I asked as we ate our sandwiches.
"Not so stressful. Feeling the liquor now." He laughed. I rolled my eyes.
We stayed at the table for a while after we finished eating. "Come on. Just one glass? You never drink with me anymore." He pouted.
"Yeah, because I'm busy parenting ten plus people. That's a lot of work." I laughed.
"Exactly." He pointed.
"One glass." I agreed.
Of course, for Tony Stark, one glass is ambiguous. He literally filled both glasses nearly to the top. I stifled a laugh. "That's not how you do that."
"Have you met me?"
"Might as well just drink from the bottle."
"Seriously?" He grinned.
"No."
"So, that boat..."
"You don't need a boat."
"I need a boat."
"Where will you put the boat?"
"In the water. Duh." He said, like it was obvious.
"Fine, get a boat. It's your money."
"I will."
"Do you know how to drive a boat?"
"No, but I'm sure I'll learn quickly enough."
"I'll teach you."
"Sounds dangerous. I'm in."
"I'm a safe driver." I rolled my eyes.
My phone rang after a bit. "Hey." I said.
"We're all just gonna stay with Uncle Clint tonight." Angela said.
"Tony, no." I pointed at him as he tried to refill the glasses. "Are you sure Clint and Laura are okay with that?"
"Yeah. They invited us."
"All of you?"
"Yeah. We're all gonna stay. We'll come back in the morning."
"All right. We'll see you then, then. Love you."
"Love you too."
"Can I talk to Imani?"
"Hey." Imani said after a minute.
"So you guys are staying with Clint?"
"Yes ma'am."
"Having fun?"
"A lot."
"All right. See you tomorrow, then."
"Okay. Bye, love you."
"Bye, love you too."
"What'd they have to say?" Tony asked.
"They're staying with Clint."
"See, we can get drunk." He refilled the glasses properly this time.
"You already are, and I don't want to be. I think it's time for bed."
"I'm not drunk."
"You may be able to hold your liquor, but if you've been drinking all day, you're very drunk. Do you wanna watch a movie?"
"Sure."
"... Can we watch Finding Dory?"
He laughed. "Of course."
"You really do look nice." Tony said as we sat curled up on the couch.
"I've already changed, Tony." I said in the voice you use when drunk people say dumb things.
"Yeah, I know. You looked nice then too. You look wonderful now."
I had already taken off my makeup and changed into pajamas. "All right, Tony."
"No, I mean it. I'm not saying it because I'm drunk. You look amazing."
"Thank you." I kissed his cheek.
"Did Imani stop cutting?" Tony asked as the movie ended.
"He said he did last I checked."
"We're going off the honor system?"
"He wore short sleeves yesterday. There was nothing fresh."
He took my arm and kissed my wrist. "I love you."
"Yeah. I love you too."