Love Without End

Chapter Thirty Four

I felt terrible stalking Steve. We kept him away from the kids as much as possible, but we couldn't do too much without having to tell people what was going on.
I knew they had a right to know, but if it wasn't real, I didn't want to tell them and be the source of the distrust that would spring from that. I didn't want to cause any more trouble.
"Where are Imani and Steve?" I asked suddenly.
"They went into the kitchen." Natasha said.
"Where's Tony?"
"He went with them."
"Where's Bruce?"
"With them."
"Okay." I sat back in my chair, kind of relaxed. This was hell.

"We can't keep doing this." I told Tony that night, in tears. "We have to stop."
"You're the one that doesn't want to confront him or kill him." Tony replied harshly. He and I had both been ill with each other since all this shit started.
"Fine. Let's just go and pray we don't get killed because he's fucking Hydra!"
"Good. Let's go." He stood up and grabbed that damn knife from the table beside him.
I had felt awkward all week with all those damn guns on me around my family, but it had been necessary. The kids were having to skip school and practices, and they were bored out of their minds. But it was worth it, I guess, in the long run.
We had JARVIS lock them all up tightly. Neither of us spoke of the insecurities of that plan.
"Here's my key. You go in the back. I'll go in the front door and talk to him first. If he tries to kill me or anything, then you may come in." I said.
"But--"
"No buts."
I let myself through Steve's unlocked front door, not too surprised to see him still awake.
"Hey." He said. "What are you doing here?"
I had had to put up with him touching me, with the thought of what he had done right at the front of my mind the whole time. But now I wasn't sure I could even handle him talking to me. I wanted Tony to come in.
I couldn't beat around the bush. I had planned to, but the words just wouldn't come out. "How could you do this?" I whispered, tears falling again.
"Do what?" He stood up from the couch.
"You killed Rhodey. How?"
His expression faltered for a short time, but then changed to a creepy smirk. "How did you find out, then?"
I wanted to scream. For the first time in forever, I had an unbearable urge to lacerate my wrist. Any part of my body would do, though, really.
I wasn't crying anymore, though. I was completely stoic. "Anonymous note. How could you do that? We were family."
"No. You just thought we were."
"Why didn't you get the kids when you had the chances, then. Why Rhodey?"
"I was just getting started. I wanted to hurt Tony before I killed him. You were next."
"Why didn't you kill my kids?" I demanded.
"I actually kind of liked them. They're kind of cute."
"What about Sam, Steve? What about Bucky?"
"What about them?"
"You heartless son of a bitch..."
"Oh, details. Now, there's something I've been wanting to do for a while.." He said.
"Kill me? Go ahead, you might as well."
"No, not quite. In due time, though." He stepped towards me. "Who else knows?"
"Nobody."
"That was a risky move, coming by yourself. To Brooklyn in itself, much less my house."
"I hoped it wasn't true."
He continued stepping towards me, but I couldn't bring myself to draw my gun. "You don't know how many times I've wanted to do this. With your blind trust, I could have done it many times, and more."
"What are you doing? Steve?" Fear creeped into my voice as I asked my questions.
What he did was completely unexpected.
He kissed me.
He kissed me! The nerve of that man! I am married!
"Steve!" I repeated, stupidly pushing him away.
He laughed, kind of. "Not half bad."
I whipped out my gun and shot him as I saw Tony behind him. Of course, it didn't kill him, only knocked him down. "Ow." He said.
But then Tony was on top of him, stabbing him. I watched in horror as blood spattered everywhere. Tony twisted the knife in his chest, and I ran out the door, throwing up in the bushes.
I curled up on the ground and didn't move. I didn't know how long it was until Tony came out, but it must have been a while, because he was clean. He sat down beside me. "I don't know where to go." His voice was tight.
"The middle of nowhere?" I suggested.
We drove for hours until we hadn't seen a house in a while. We stepped out of the car simultaneously. I dropped to the ground and screamed at the top of my lungs. I think Tony was screaming too, but I wasn't sure.
We stayed like that for a while, hyperventilating, screaming, crying--each of us having anxiety attacks on our respective sides.
After a while, he came over and sat beside me. I didn't want anybody to touch me, and, thankfully, he didn't. So we just sat there.
"What happened to your arm?" He asked after a while, voice raw.
With a matching voice, I admitted that I didn't know. I had probably clawed at it in my panic attack.
"Don't do that." He said, staring at it.
I turned my arm over so he couldn't see it anymore. "How are we supposed to tell everyone this? Especially the kids..."
"I don't know."
We called the police on the way home.
We told the rest of the Avengers when we got there. Sam said he had an appointment, but I told him to skip it.
"Where's Steve?" Wanda asked.
"Dead." I said, and my voice cracked.
"He's what?" Everyone said.
"Dead. We killed him."
Everybody was talking at once, and I didn't know who was saying what, so I just sat down and started to cry. Everybody shut up and looked at me, but I ignored them.
A moment later, the message that had been left for Tony was playing and people started to sit back down.
"This is bullshit." Bucky said.
"He admitted to it." I said. "I recorded it."
"Why?" Sam asked, staring at the ground.
"Because I didn't know if you'd believe me."
I played the recording.
"What did he do?" Bruce asked.
"He kissed me." I mumbled quietly.
"He what?" Bruce demanded, and everybody turned to look at him. "Heathen." He said.
"I have to go." Bucky said, and walked out.
Everybody dispersed, but I stayed where I was, staring at the ground.
I had shot Steve, one of my best friends, my family. How had I done that?
How could he have done that? He was supposed to be family. Family doesn't kill family.
And Steve was supposed to be respectful and polite, not a murderer who kisses married women.
This was all so fucked up. What were we supposed to tell the kids?
"Hey, kids. Uncle Steve was actually working for an evil corporation and he killed Uncle Rhodey. But we shot and stabbed him, so don't worry."
Yeah, right. No way in hell.
I got up and walked out.
"Where're you going?" Tony and Bruce asked from across the room.
"Church." I would have invited them, but I wanted to be alone.
I walked into the church and took a quick look around. It was deserted, so I walked up to the altar. I stared up at the cross suspended above it before dropping to my knees.
"Why did you even make people?" I whispered.