Shameless Love - Park Chanyeol

2

Emma

- Saturday November 12th

After that emotional visit with my grandmother, I decided to drive home. My eyes started getting red from all that crying. All my mind could think about was my mother. How things would've turned out if she was still alive. The fact that I don't have too many memories of her just upsets me even more. I just miss her so much, it hurts.

~

When I got home, I parked my car outside on the driveway since we done have any space in the garage but only for one vehicle which is my dad's jeep. I saw his jeep was in the garage, so he is home from work too. He works as a dental surgeon at the 'We Smile Dentistry'. He gets paid each month and I get paid from the restaurant every 2 weeks so we're still good on taxes and house payments. It's tough, but we get through this together. We always have.

When I closed the front door, I heard footsteps coming towards my way indicating that it's my dad. You can see the delight in his eyes when he sees me as he says "Hey Emmalyne. There is a steak I cooked on the table so let's eat." As he had his arms out for an embrace, I gladly accept. Emmalyne is my real name but I prefer to be called Emma. We both then made our way to the table after our hug.

After eating this delicious steak for a bit, he then says to me "Emma, I have some interesting news that will probably change things around here, but mostly for you. Let me finish until the very end okay kiddo?" I furrowed my eyebrows as I was still chewing the steak in my mouth, but then gulped and nodded feeling a little anxious to what he's going to say.

"Okay so earlier today, I uh-" he took a deep breath and continued "registered you for high school.." my eyes basically shot out of my head. Is he insane?? My whole body just stopped, not really but sat still as a rock not knowing what to do or say. He then continued by saying "You can't be homeschooled your whole life, you need to be more educated and be more social. This will be the best for you."

All I could think about is not fitting in, classmates bullying me, failing, anything could happen. I bit my lip trying to hold in the tears from forming. He then says "I know this will be very hard for you, but you will do amazing Em, you always do." He had his hand on my shoulder to comfort me, but not showing my weak side, still looking down feeling timid as ever. I gulped and said "When do I start?" Looking up at him to face him, still feeling like I'm going to have a bad headache after this dinner.

"You'll start Monday. So please be prepared by then okay?" Took a deep breath trying to process this whole transition. This will not be easy for me. This will be a huge step for me, I've been homeschooled my whole life. Still not knowing how to even make a friend. I don't have friends at work, they are just acquaintances to me. There's a big possibility that no ones going to be fond of me once people at school notice me, the new girl.

But to respond to my dad who is still waiting for an answer, I respond with a "K." We both then put our dirty dishes away and both went our separate ways. I walked straight to my room, locked my door, and fell backwards onto my bed. All these horrid thoughts in my mind to what high school will be like. Watching too many high school movies, there's always bullying and it just makes me feel more agitated. Since today felt very interminable, my eyes started to feel more and more heavy as I fell asleep in a slow slumber on my bed.

- Monday November 14th

Today is my first day at an actual high school, and all my mind is coming towards to was what it will be like. Will it be a living hell or will it be amazing? Who knows. I started the ignition to my car and drove to high school. The whole time of the drive, I took deep breaths and tried to think about the positives... which there's nothing coming to mind. Damn it.