The boy who found me

chapter 9

Rains POV:

When i plunge my hands into the warm soapy water i hum in appreciation and shut my eyes. It's times like this when im at home alone that i feel safe. I allow myself to wear short sleeved shirts to give my arms a breather. Nicola's at work and Tuck had to take Harper to dance lessons. So i took the opportunity to stay at home.. By myself.. The way i like it.

I breath in the nice scent of lemon and listen to the absolute silence as i start to soak the dishes from yesterday in the hot water. Its peaceful and calm. No hint of danger. No hint of anything at all really, I don't have to fake any smiles or force my self to have a conversation. I can just walk aroud the house in a noodle strap tank top and shorts and not have to worry about explaining all the gashes covering my body. I can be me.

I dont even mind cleaning. I actually kinda like it. When i was little i always dreamed of living in a huge house, married to Tuck. I wanted to have 4 children to take care of. I wanted 3 boys and one girl. I would have named my eldest son Hunter, the next boy would be Keegan, and my younest son would be named Oliver. Of course you cant forget about my little baby girl, I would spoil her. Not to the point of being rottin, but i would spoil her in the way that i wanted to be spoiled when i was little. My beautiful  daughters name would be Cicilia Anne. When i was little I wanted to be a house wife and I was 100% sure back then that i would have been a mother.

Looking back on it now i smirk a little at how naive and innocent i was. It was cute of me to think that i would have gotten rid of my past by now. It was stupid how i thought everything would have got better. Oh well i guess. It's not like there is much for me to do right now anyways. I can't just start my dream life when I have no where to start.

Tuck has stayed away from me. I know i told him to but i didnt think that he actually would have givin up.  Yeah, I was pissed off at him. But im not that mad anymore. Okay I might be a little mad but thats only because he is ignoring me! I didnt expect the guy to just say 'okay' and walk away. Im still a girl, I still say things that i dont mean.

The more i thought about it the more mad i got. I didn't realize that i was in the middle of washing a knife when i was in deep thought. I didn't realize that i was griping the knife very hardly and the sink water was no longer beautifully clear but it was a murky red.

"Shit" I whispered in a hushed panick and dropped the knife in the sink.

Water splashed out of the sink now blood is all over the place. it was on my shirt, on the floor, on the counter. I really didnt mean to cut myself this time, it just happened. Now im going to have to wash the dishes all over again. No big deal i guess, I know how to clean this all up. God, theres just so much blood every where.

I pulled the drain out of the sink and started rinsing my gash under cold water. Theres still blood all over the floor from the water splashing out of the sink, but i'll get that later. I stood there in a trance, just watching how much blood was coming out of my hand that i didnt even hear the door open.

"Oh my god.." I heard behind me.

 My heart skipped a beat as i hear Tuck utter these words. What the fuck do i do?! If i turn around he will see the scars from my cuts, if i dont turn around then he will come over to me and then he will really see my scars.. Oh my god! What the Fuck!

"What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be at-" I tried stalling but he interupted me.

"Dont worry about me, What happened? Why is there blood all over?" Worry obvious in his voice. I shut the sink off.

I decided that playing dumb was my best option, "What do you mean?" I need more time to think.

"Rain," He said and i knew he wasnt willing to joke around. He wanted to know what happened and he wanted to know now.