Clean ⇔ Cashton ✓

Turn The White Snow Red As Strawberries In The Summertime

ASHTON

My parents split up when I was young. It's been a long time since I've seen my father, since he left, but I can still remember the feeling in my chest when I woke up knowing he was gone.

It felt like my heart was ripped straight out of my chest, enclosed in my father's fist as red dripped down his fingers without a care. He left me gasping for air, struggling to find stability on a house that felt like it was sinking into the earth. My siblings were even worse, too young and too innocent to know what had happened, where there father had gone off to. For the first few weeks, they believed he was off on a work trip. The older they got, the quicker they realized what really happened. I don't think I ever spoke the words: "Dad left." But they understood, and they wilted under the knowledge like a dried up rose, curling in on themselves and shielding their eyes from the sun.

I took on the responsibility of the father, despite my young age and aching chest. I couldn't let my emotions bleed on my face for my siblings to see, so I hid it under false smiles and words of assurement. I cared for them when my father failed to, and I loved them while my father forgot all about us. I saw my heartbroken mother try and pick up the broken pieces my father created, and I lost my faith that love exists. How can it, when my hands are calloused from protecting my siblings, and when my heart is hollow from the emptiness of my absent father?

Seeing Calum's fresh tears drip down his cheeks at the effect of his boyfriend's anger is a reminder. I've watched the colors spread over his skin like a hurricane of mistakes, staining his body like a painting. I've seen his wide brown eyes fill with tears and become glossy when he puts weight on a bruised bone, and I've seen fear paralyze his muscles when the blonde man comes into view. I've seen it, and it's broken my heart every single time.

None of that hurt quite as much as when I saw the ring on Calum's finger, seen the slight hesitation before forcing a smile on his face. I saw the way he crumpled like a leaf by Luke's side, succumbing to his power without a word in fear of what he might do if he didn't. I've seen the honest, raw part of Calum, the part that I know Luke hasn't ever seen. The part that Calum let's show because he's not afraid of being hurt. I've seen him truly happy, and he isn't truly happy with Luke.

I don't know what made him fall in love with the man. I know it isn't the money or the recognition, because I've seen his eyes light up at the simplicity of things. I don't know what he has endured in the past to believe that Luke's behavior is normal, but I tried to get Calum to see the other side, the better side. But he's shut all that out with one simple "yes". The one word that confirmed his fate with Luke, the engagement ring fitting snug on his finger like an act of finality. And now, I don't know what to do to get him out of it.

We're both working today, and I see him anxiously fiddle with the ring constantly, a look of nervousness in his eyes when he thinks nobody's looking. I never know how to handle it. A beautiful boy weakened by his controlling fiancé. I've never had to deal with anything like that before.

The restaurant reaches its closing time, and I put away all my things in the back room with all the other employees, a quiet murmur circulating the room. Michael bumps into me quite intentionally, flashing me a smile as he hangs up his things.

"The kid got married. You see that?" Michael says, nodding towards Calum, who is making his way out of the door to leave. His hair brushes over his dark eyelashes, his eyes lowered as he leaves. His ring glints in the light. "That ring could pay my rent for years."

"Yeah. I'm happy for him," I say, which most definitely is a lie, but Michael doesn't seem to catch on.

"Can't imagine why he'd want to marry into the Hemmings' family," Michael says. We walk out towards the front of the restaurant to the parking lot. "Our families have been close for years, and let me tell you. They're insane. Luke is an absolute clone of his father."