Sleepyhead

Recently Fucked and Now Unstoppable

There’s something about just having your mind blown metaphorically (and in my case, quite literally) that causes you to...I don’t know...feel on top of the world.

My mind was on point. Witty remarks? Zap. Sutton’s got you.

Think you can beat me at a marathon round of Noughts and Crosses? Fuck you, I’ll kick your ass.

Sutton Lark: Recently Fucked and Now Unstoppable.

Come at me, bros.

Or don’t, because to be completely honest my thighs and ass hurt pretty fucking bad already. And although all I really wanted to do was curl up in bed with an asspack on my bum, I still had to go out. 

And look fit.

(That last part shouldn’t be hard, am I right? Right?)

Gosh, I’m hilarious today!

But I also had like, five minutes to get ready to go out and look like a fucking rockstar, so I needed to focus my mind.

After, you know, putting back on my clothes and exchanging a few snotty remarks with Zayn, I managed to find my own room with Astrid. The Ging was already ready to go out, sporting an adorable little number that, of course, didn’t make her look sexy but rather just really pretty.

Sometimes I wonder how we’re friends! Honestly.

I told her to wear one of my dresses, she asked where I had been. I lied and said I got lost. She actually believed me.

That was concerning.

Honestly, the fact that my friends think I’m incapable of everyday tasks is worrisome. Am I really that fucked up?

Don’t answer that. For the love of God.

Please don’t.

But alas, Astrid glared at me for a good five minutes while I hurried to get ready. I did the fastest shower ever (thirty seven seconds, new personal best. not washing my hair, mind you.) and managed to dig through my suitcase that Liam Payne, bless him, dropped off.

“Sexy light blue bandage dress that makes me look like a fucking model?” I yanked it out of my suitcase, only slightly wrinkled. Astrid pulled a disgusted face. “Or this red sundress that won't turn anyone on because they’ll think I’m twelve years old?”

I held up both dresses for her, wiggling my hips around.

She flinched, “Maybe you should put a bra on before you do that.”

“You know how I enjoy being in the nude,” I quipped. “Now choose!”

Honestly, she’s seen me naked more times than she has seen me clothed, I think. 

It’s not that I’m just constantly naked.

Okay. Scratch that.

I’m always nude.

Whatever, it’s freeing.

Sorry?

“I honestly think you could wear a potato sack and look fit, Sut.” Astrid sighed, one hand on the door. “Let’s go! Just pick one.”

“But they’re both so cute...” I mumbled, eyes shifting between them. I turned back to her, puppy eyes in action.

That’ll get her and her cold soul.

“Ugh, fine. The red one. The blue is too,” she flitted her fingers about. “Slaggy.”

“Blue it is!” I grinned, tossing the red one back into the suitcase.