Michael's Guide To Third Wheeling || Michael Clifford

Another Chapter for the Single People

"That was a cheesy ending."

"That was so long ago. I thought you were publishing that years ago! And is it our fault you asked us to edit the last part of the chapter?"

"He likes our work," said the latter, putting his hand on his girlfriend's shoulder with a coy smile. "He just doesn't want to sound like a mush--even if he is in the inside."

"Mushy...hmm what an exotic feeling! Electrifying!" answered one other, while the girl beside me gave an alert glance at his hands to make sure he wasn't moving them around too much.

"If you want, you can make another chapter without us editing the last part," continued the dark haired boy. "After all, we thought you'd make a sequel."

Another chapter? my thoughts interrupted me.

The ceremony was taking place early in the fresh month of January and boxes with ribbons were piling up on a furnished white table which carried the additional weight of an enormous overdecorated cake, a gift from Luke. The bells rang and the place smelled of dewy flowers--which sent Calum sneezing on my face. The other guests who came along took notice and stayed away. I looked at them, and I could not discern more than half of the faces and yet they came to me, laughing, introducing me to their kids who looked like they were going to die from boredom.

"Mom?" said one. "Why's he wearing such an ugly suit?"

"Shush, darling," answered the mother in a not hushed tone. "Maybe he's going through a harsh time in his life. Today will be different for him at least."

Whether or not a suit determined if someone was going through a rough time, I was outside in an instant, turning in circles. Another chapter hmm? my thoughts came around again.

And it got me thinking...

Then someone called my name and pushed me forward. "Why are you just standing there? Enter already! Everyone's looking."

I straightened up like a stiff soldier, all sweat pouring down my back. I staggered my way through the sweet smelling church while the sound of the organ played in the background.

I waited with the rest of the anxious faces while the little children winked at each other, walking on the carpet carrying along baskets and flowers. More and more tear stained faces appeared, walking in the same direction I took, before a brilliant light coming from outside the huge door shone brightly against the last person to enter. Those who previously stayed away from Calum, were now filled with gasps of awe and some could not control the tears rushing down their eyes like a waterfall.

A woman in white walked towards the direction I took, gliding against the carpet with her dress trailing behind her smoothly. Even through the white veil that masked her face, I could see that her smile was ever present and her face was glowing with a new flush.

And thus it began.

It was going on smoothly. While I was standing before more than a hundred people, I needed to go to the washroom. I tried my best to ease myself by looking at the priest but he kept mumbling to himself and Calum's constant sneezing didn't help either.

I shut my eyes. Focus, focus, I told myself. ...oh shoot I really need to go.

When I opened it again, everyone's eyes were on me. Had I peed on my pants? Was everything over?

I stood there dumbly, unaware of what was going on. I looked at the priest casually as if nothing happened.

"The, ahem, vows?"

It sounded like I was chewing over my words, when I blurted out a loud, "Oh, that! Right! Just a moment...." My right hand was shaking as it made its way to my pocket to dig for a folded paper, but I couldn't find any and so I panicked.