Galaxies

Fuck

Blade.

FuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckFuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckFuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckFuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckFuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.

I kissed her. Oh god I kissed her. Fuck.

I barely realize I'm getting in the car. I barely notice when I put the car in drive and slam on the gas pedal. I barely feel the car rocket down the street.

I can't believe I kissed her. Shit. She hates me now. I can't believe I did that. Oh god... Oh god.

I need a cigarette. And some shots. Hell I need every drug I got.

I don't notice myself pulling into my driveway. I sprint up the stairs to my room. I light a cigarette on the way up. I find the box in the back of my closet with my drugs. I open it, and find the coke. A good high will help.

I feel my phone buzzing in my pocket. I look. It's London. I hit Decline, afraid to talk to her.

I need more coke. I go back to the box. There's no coke left. I dig to the bottom, nothing but weed and some pills and a mystery substance on the top. At the bottom, my hand hits a bottle. A small bottle. Full of pills, a random assortment.

I take the bottle to my desk. Get out paper. A pencil. Start writing. Write write write. What I writing? I have no idea. I love London. I kissed her. Fuck.

I put the paper in an envelope. I write something on it. What am I writing? I don't know. Oh fuck I love London. I kissed her. Shit.

I'm emptying the bottle into my hand. Three pills taken at a time. Dry. Could use water. Try to stand up. Can't stand. Room getting darker. Phone buzzing. London? Dad?

Who's in the doorway? Long hair. Pretty. Prettiest girl I've ever seen. Why is the ceiling sideways? Why is it so dark in here? I can't move. Someone turn the lights on.

Someone's calling my name. Screaming. Crying. Pretty girl. Don't cry. It's okay.

I know the pretty girl. What's her name? Can't remember her name. Was it England? I dunno. She's getting darker. Why are you getting darker?

England is trying to tell me something. It sounds like she's underwater.

She pulls me into her lap. Hi, pretty girl. It's really dark in here, I can't see you. Come back pretty girl.

I feel something soft on my lips. Pretty girl is kissing me.

Wait. No. Pretty girl's name is London. I'm in love with her. And I kissed her. And then she kissed me.

Fuck.