You're My Therapy

Please Have Faith

My mom almost killed Kris, I could tell by the way she tried to kick him out.

"Thank you but you can go home now," she said to him the day after she arrived. He looked at me.

"Um, no, I'm supposed to care for her. They kinda trained me to do that," he said.

"But we don't need you," she said, trying to pat my head. I glared at her and she stopped in mid air.

"Mom. He's. Staying."

"Sweety, your mom is here to care for you, get rid of that nasty virus. Okay?" she said.

"It's. Not. A. Virus. It's. A. Heart. Condition," I said, glaring at her.

"Nonsense," she said quietly. I grabbed the cane that they used to help me walk and threatened to swing at her. She stared at me in shock. "You must have mad cow disease," she said. I swung, smacking her in the arm. "Ow!" she shouted.

"I'm. Dying. And. If. You. Can't. Take. That. Seriously. Leave," I said. She stared at me, then stormed out of the room. I heard her shouting and slamming stuff around.

"Does she usually do that when she's mad?" Kris asked.

"Yeah," I said.

                                                    {*}

Two months is what it took to heal. I went to the doctor and they declared me safe to stop with the oxegen tank and walker. I walked around for a bit, getting used to it. I smiled at Kris as he hovered protectively at my side.

I could talk normal now, and I could sing and breathe and walk and live. I think this all made everyone - besides Austin - realize life is really rare and priceless and can be taken at any moment. My mom left that night, and my band left about a week after that. It was nice to be in regular routine again, even though Kris insisted on checking on me every hour.

"Kris," I said about three days of him popping in and out every hour. "You really don't need to do this. You might as well live in this apartment if you wanna do that."

He just shook his head and left again. He confused me, no doubt about that. Him being near all the time and with me all the time made me feel something, something new. I wasn't sure what it was, but I'd never felt it before.

Brody called a few times, asking to go out, but I couldn't. I really wasn't feeling it with him, but he was such a nice guy and really good looking.

About a week after Kris' in and out checkups, I realized what the feeling was.

It was like. Serious like.

                                                    {*}

"What the hell are you talking about?" I yelled at the phone. I listened. "How could you? After everything we've been through? You're really willing to leave?" I yelled. "No! I don't give a shit! Is this band is touring Warped and have two number one albums? Do they?" I catch my breath. "Fine. Whatever. I'll tell the other guys. Thanks for everything." I hang up and breathe, clutching my phone to me. Then I throw my phone with all of my force at the wall and scream.

"What is it?" Kris screams, running in the room.

"Dan is such an asshole! " I yell.

"Nicki, you need to calm down. If your heart works to much everything will go back to step one," he said in a calming voice.

I breathe in and out, trying to calm my heart. When it finally calms I look at Kris and nod. He walks over and sits me down on the couch. "Now what's wrong?" he asks.