Chapter 10

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(9:30pm. I come out of my shell)

I inhale the air around me deeply.

"When I left New York and moved here, I most certainly thought that whatever horrible past I had, I could leave behind me but truth is, things follow you around until you finally learn to move on from them and to be quite honest, I haven't moved on from whatever happened back then," I begin. He relaxes a bit and goes to ease, releasing its time I spill everything. He nods for me to go on.

"My dad, or my parents, this is really hard to explain, but when I ran away from home, basically set out a life for me, a job, everything, they watched my every move, well not exactly but they basically planned my life. They got arrested for that and a couple of other things but we will go back to that later. I want to focus on a specific part," I tell him.

"Well I'm ready to hear it and please don't hesitate," He assures me. "I'm here to listen, to be here for you... Because I care... About you"

"So I don't know if you know but I obviously had a love before you. A serious love, he was my everything for a really long time until I found out he was working for my dad as well but he was someone who's seen my worst and my best, has seen me at my most my vulnerable. Um.. This is really weird but I was in a really bad state at one point where I jumped from a roof and almost lost my eyesight, he helped me recover and recovery is another clue here. He wasn't a doctor back then but... When I walked into the hospital that day with my bad ankle..."

"Your old love is your doctor now?"

"Yeah... But just my doctor, there's nothing between us. That's for sure because 'I' left him. Lately I've noticed people who worked with my dad, or one to be specific, walk into your house and that's why I didn't want to stay at your place. After that jog that day I saw one my dad's men. I got scared and Harry, my doctor now, came to talk to me about how I was and he said it was really weird that my dads men would know your family and just for a while, I, alone wanted to escape to New York. Just to be away from all of this," This is enough for today, now I'll just answer questions.

"Wait so you're saying Peter works for your dad? Are you sure? Peter has been my friend from childhood and we've grown up together, he never even left LA," Mark says, his eyebrows furrowed. We were both confused now.

"The only way to find out now... Is to meet him," I gulp and look away. I have too. Somethings going on here, I have a very strong memory of Peter and me spending those days in my parents house. How he helped me escape and how he never cared to visit me after my almost near death experience. I remember him really well, his blue eyes, his bob cut hair and his skinny and tall body. "I remember him Mark, I know him, he was in New York and you have to believe me"

"I believe you but I need to know more, I need to know more to understand all this," He sighs. I think to myself, if I already told him this much, it won't hurt to just spill it all.

"If I do, we're going to be up all night," I say.

"I'm up for it, I don't care, I want to here it all," He gets up and joins me on my couch.

"Well hold yourself together because you're in for a long night," I begin.

(3:23pm. The next day)

I sit up in bed. I look around as I run my hands through my hair and rub my eyes, stretching right after. Mark was still asleep, dead asleep more like. I look over to the clock in our room and it was late in the afternoon. I still can't believe I told everything to Mark last night. I'm rethinking about that all now, whether I should have done it or not. Whatever happens now, he knows too much. He promised to keep it a secret and then we had some good sex. I guess that was the closure I needed after what happened with Harry and that whole kiss incident. I can't fall into traps again, I can't be mislead by someone's actions, which used to have an affect on me. I have someone to lookout for now and someone who looks out for me, I have a priority, a trust and bond to keep.

I pick up my phone and rush to the balcony outside our living room. I call Harry. He picks up two rings in.

Harry: Thank God you called, I was getting all impatient an-
Me: Listen, this is probably not what you're expecting but I just want to cut off all access and communication between us.
Harry: Wh-Wha-What- But why?
Me: Listen Harry, I need to you to move on. I moved on. I have a fiancé. A man I love, a man I trust, a man I need to give my all and my full faith to, I can't just be screwing around and sending you secret messages or meeting up or have you showing up anywhere
Harry: I just-
Me: I'm sorry okay? But it's better if I do this, it's the best for both of us...
Harry: You think this is fine? You thought it was fine LEAVING me that night? Leaving me without any sort of contact between us two? I couldn't even call you, do you know how hard it was? 5 years Audrey! I tried everything I could to call you or like go looking for you but I had no fucking clue where you were. I've waited 5 fucking years to hear that fucking voice, you think I chose this life for me? You think I chose to chase you after finally seeing you after 5 years? I DONT CHOOSE TO! It just happens! BECAUSE I STILL FUCKING CARE, IT STILL-
Me: STOP! just Stop it! I don't need to hear this! You fucking said there were no strings attached and we would be only friends, you're taking this too far, for God's sake it's been five years, move on already! I don't even know you anymore! I'm done... Don't call me again, actually don't worry, I will be blocking your number
Harry: Audr-

I cut the line, falling to my knees. I wanted to cry, I wanted to cry really bad but this is not the time. I need to let go off this, I stare at the empty street down from my balcony. Why does he love me? How can he even love after that whole fucking show of just using me to play one of my dads games on me. I hear footsteps behind me and I look and see Mark. He was rubbing his eyes, he stood there shirtless and in his basketball shorts.

"What're you doing out here?," he yawns and stretches out his arms.

"Just getting some fresh air," I smile and get up. I go and hug him and he kisses my forehead.

"Just wanted you to know that I really appreciate you opening up to me last night," he looks down at me. I nod and bite my lower lip as I look away. Hopefully what I told him last night doesn't change his view towards me. I don't want things changing between us.

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