Memories

I hope

I hope you see this. I hope when you read it your heart aches, your stomach turns, and you blood boils. I hope you get sad, sick, and angry. I hope you tell all your friends to look at this so they can laugh at how fucking pathetic this is, I hope you show your mom. I hope you cry. I hope you feel like crap. I hope you feel like I did. If you weren't ready for a fucking relationship then why ask to be in one? You asked me, it wasn't the other way around. You did this to both of us. You broke my fucking heart. I hope you know that. After I told you I didn't want to feel that way ever again and you made me feel worse than ever before. Because god, you made me feel alive. You made me love myself. You helped me better myself. You made me so fucking happy. And I know I wasn't the best girlfriend, and I know I'm insecure. I know I fight over little things and let you know every little thing on my mind. I know I messed up. But at least I can admit it. Unlike you, who is closed and never let's it out. I'm sorry and I've never meant it more than right now. I am so so sorry. I love you and I always will. Yes I know I'm only 16, but I know what I felt for you was love. I hope reading this helped in a way. This is the last time you'll hear from me, if you ever do read this. I hope you get to feeling better, I hope you get honestly happy. I hope you find someone who makes you feel how you made me feel. I hope you continue to laugh, and joke around. I hope you stay wound up in your tradition. I hope you start doing stuff for yourself and not the people around you. I hope you graduate and have kids. But most of all, I hope you read this and feel what I feel.