"I'm Fine"

Faith

So I recently watched a movie it was like miracles something and it had Jennifer Gardner and Queen Latifa. It's a religious movie about a girl who gets sick out of the blue their family is already religious the mom loses faith. Little girl starts to get better and then falls down 30ft in the hollow part of a 100 year old tree. The little girl should be dead but the mom prays and regain faith and her daughter meets the lord comes back with no injuries whatsoever. In fact the terminal disease she had..... Is gone. No way to explain it but God.

See I'm jealous of that. I want my faith and i feel like I lost that. The flame God lit in my heart when I was younger has been put out. Why is it that usually children have these experiences and stronger faith?

I'm 14 and I'm 225 pounds.

When I was younger I was beautiful.

I'm now hideous in my eyes.

My faith when I was younger was so strong I .... I can't explain it.

Now I have to plead with myself not to hurt gods holy temple which he's called my body.

I've broken and the glue that is my faith in God is no where to be found.

I want it

I need it

I haven't prayed in a while and meant it. I want to pray where I feel it again.

Lord please let me feel truely happy again.

Let me walk in your kingdom. Let me help bloom your word in others.

I pray that one day I while find my friend I will be finished and that friend will focus me on you again.

I love you.

Please hold me.

For I and fragile in this world