Life of Death

Memories

Since I was born I lived with a foster child who I got used to calling my foster brother. When I was 6  or 7 he got taken away from us to live in a different home, unfortunately this happened right before we were about to adopt him. The person I grew up with and loved as family got ripped away from me before I knew what was happening. All of a sudden the familiarity that I knew was gone.

I find I've  been remembering him a lot more lately:

I remember that that time he told someone at school we had a gun and the police showed up at our house later that day. All because an innocent little boy thought a toy gun was real.

I remember the time he accidentally pushed me into the corner of a brick wall which caused me to need stitches. All because an innocent little boy was rushing to get dinner.

I remember my parents used to get a lot of calls from his school because he was being disruptive and violent and needed to be picked up. All because an innocent little boy got a bad plot in life.

I remember being told stories of how him and my older sister waited eagerly with the babysitter for my arrival. All because an innocent little boy wanted a little sister.

I remember he got put into school while my sister and I were homeschooled because my mum couldn't handle all of us. All because an innocent little boy couldn't concentrate.

All these memories may sound bad to you but I treasure them. They are the only remaining thing I have of my brother. They make me smile and laugh and sometimes cry because I no longer have him with me. Without these memories a part of me wouldn't exist. I find myself wishing i had an older brother now and in a way I do, I just don't know him.

I wonder what happened to him; what he's like now.
Did he get adopted?
Did he find a loving family?
Did he end up in a group home?
Is he a nice young man?
Or a troubled boy?
Is he getting good grades?
Or is he failing school?
So he even in school anymore?
Is he into drugs?
Or living a healthy life?
Is he happy?
Or depressed?
Is he safe?
Does he remember me?
What does he look like?
But mostly I just want to know if he's ok.
As long as I know this I'll be fine.
But I don't...