Two of a kind (phan and kickthestickz)

Chapopter 30

Is it weird I'm not excited for Christmas but I am for the John Lewis Christmas advert?




"I'll be back later okay? I just don't think living at your house all this week will make my mum feel very loved," Damian giggled pecking Phil's lips gently as Phil tried to cling to him as best he could, holding onto his arm tightly.
"But where will I get my kisses?" Phil whined, cuddling into him.
"You will get extra when I come back okay? Is that alright?" Damian asked and Phil looked thoughtful, looking childish as he bit his lip in deep thought then nodded.
"Okay. Text me okay?" He said and Damian nodded and smiled, kissing his lips before walking out the open door, waving behind him without looking around, knowing Phil was watching him walk away. Phil sighed and shut the door, resting against it heavily, smiling to himself. Was it bad to admit he already missed Damian? He pulled his hoodie tightly around him and played with the sleeves. Right, now he had to do something with his day. Erm... He actually couldn't think. He just wanted to cuddle with Damian and that was what he couldn't do. So animal crossing it was.


His phone buzzed in his pocket as he flopped down on the sofa. He pulled it out and smiled, it was from Chris.


Hey Phil do you wanna meet up with me and Pj and go out for lunch in town? X


Yeah what time? X


Come by my house at 11, Pj is still asleep, I wore him out poor love ;) x


Ew Chris too much information. See you soon and please don't tell me anymore about your sex life x


Phil stretched and stood up. 10 o'clock and naturally he was still in his pyjamas. He hadn't really changed much over the past few days (apart from shedding a few layers at certain points) because he had spent so much time with Damian. His hoodie was slowly becoming a part of him but at least it was autumn so he wouldn't overheat in it.


He lumbered upstairs and dived into the shower, putting on some music before jumping into the hot water and shaking his head as the droplets fell over his fringe and down his face. He grabbed his fruity shampoo and rubbed it through his hair, sticking his hair up in funny ways with the suds before rinsing it out.
"And all the boys are smoking menthols, Girls are getting back rubs, I will drift to you if you make yourself shake fast enough!" He sang loudly, nodding his head as he sung. He was glad no one could hear him. He switched the shower off after using the raspberry shower gel (which he kept stealing from his mum but never told her) and quickly got out, wrapping a towel around his waist while putting another around his shoulders. Phil giggled and drew a smiley face in the mirror, then a little heart with the letter 'D' in the middle and blushed to himself. That was the only problem with a relationship, he was slowly turning into a teenage girl.


He walked out the bathroom back to his room and made sure he was dry before looking in his wardrobe for a clean t-shirt and pair of jeans and boxers, pulling them on and quickly putting his straighteners on. He found some socks and was about to put Damian's hoodie back on, but opted for a jumper instead. Chris and Pj didn't know about him and Damian. Or had they seen Dan and knew? Either way the hoodie was going to stay at home for a bit, it was probably for the best, it was starting to become like Phil's skin, always attached to him. He blow dried his hair then straightened the ends to stop them flicking, checking the time- half past- and looked around for his shoes, finding them under his desk (he didn't have a clue how they got there) and laced them up, grabbing his jacket off his door and checking it for his wallet and keys. He moved them into his jeans and grabbed his phone off his bed which was still playing Fall Out Boy, switching it off and tucking it in his pocket. He thought he had a message but would check it on the way over, he needed to get going.


He stuck his headphones in his ears and it was time to go, leaving a note for his mum in case he wasn't home before her and set off, locking the door behind him. He got his phone back out, no message, oh, ah well, then shook it off and continued playing his music as he set off towards Chris's. Luckily it wasn't far away so he wouldn't have to walk for too long.



When he got there he rang the doorbell, ripping his headphones out and stuffing them in his pocket. He heard scuffling from behind the door and then it opened and Chris almost fell on top of him.
"Pj don't push me," he whined as he staggered upright.
"I didn't push you you have a broken door it doesn't open!" Pj exclaimed, half tugging on a jacket.
"Sure that's they all say," Chris said darkly.
"That's because it's true. Hey guys," Phil said and gave a little wave. Chris and Pj looked at each other, grinned, and then launched themselves at Phil, almost making him fall over with the group hug. "Guys I can't breathe!" He choked out and Pj let go, but Chris squeezed harder.
"Phhhiiillll," he said in a high pitched voice as he clung to him. Phil knew he was going red from lack of oxygen and looked at Pj, hoping he would help remove the python called Chris.
"Chris get off him you're killing him," Pj told him and Chris looked up and smiled.
"Is that a problem?" He smirked and Pj rolled his eyes, but was smirking.
"Yes!" Phil gasped and Chris finally let go.
"You know I hate you," Phil panted a little and Chris nodded, before shutting his door and locking it.
"Shall we go?" He asked and they all instantly started walking.


They got out the gate and Pj grabbed Chris's hand, letting out a loud yawn.
"Tired Peej?" Phil asked, smirking slightly.
"Yeah, rough night, didn't get much sleep," he said casually, but looking away from him and Chris. Phil couldn't help but smile at Chris who was grinning smugly.
"So Chris I take it this was all your fault, keeping him up with your schemes again?" Phil asked and Pj went red, realising Phil had caught on.
"Oh yes," Chris said loudly and Pj shoved him, making him hit into Phil.
"Hey!" Phil protested and pushed Chris back, making him knock Pj.
"No I am not getting in the middle of this, I am too precious to be knocked around by you ruffians," he said lightly, dropping Pj's hand and skipping forwards, waving his arms around. Phil and Pj stopped, simultaneously looking round at each other and bursting into laughter before following their weird friend.


"So princess," Pj called to him and Chris stopped and turned around, looking foolish.
"So prince," he replied.
"So idiots," Phil joined in and they all laughed. Chris took Pj's hand again and they turned the corner into town, walking forwards even though none of them knew where they were going.


"So... What shop first?" Phil asked.
"Claire's accessories," Chris answered and Phil giggled, but Chris looked serious. "What, really?" Chris stared him, looking hurt, but then grinned.
"No you muppet. I don't know, Pj?" He asked.
"Erm, the music shop round the corner alright for you guys? I want a new guitar at some point," he said and they all nodded, turning around the corner and seeing the dark music shop, brightly colours ukuleles and guitars in the windows. "Ah, home," Pj said before walking inside, making them all smile. Pj split off from Chris to look at the acoustic guitars while Chris walked over to the drum kits, Phil following him. Chris sat on one of the drum stools and span around on it before picking up the drum sticks and warily hitting one of the drums.
"How the fuck do you drum?" He asked Phil who shrugged.
"No idea but I guess you hit the thing with the stick?" Phil said and Chris raised his eyebrows.
"No shit,"
"Just hit the drum in a tune,"
"Alright," Chris said and nervously started trying to drum, not doing too terribly when he got into a rhythm. Phil wandered over to Pj who was gazing at the guitars and pulling on off the stand, sliding the strap around his shoulders before plucking a small tune, stroking along the wood in awe.
"Sounds good, what is that?" Phil asked him.
"Just something I have been working on," he said, still concentrating on the chords as he played softly.
"It sounds really good Peej, I don't know how you come up with this stuff," Phil told him and Pj smiled and stopped strumming, watching Chris fondly smashing at the cymbals, grinning to himself while he played the drums loudly.
"I think random inspiration," Pj said soft and smiled to himself, looking down before plucking another tune on the guitar, much like the one Chris was playing. Phil smiled at his best friend, finding it so sweet how much he loved his boyfriend.


"You're so cute," Phil told him and then Chris walked over to them.
"Like the guitar Peej?" He asked and Pj nodded, still smiling to himself. "Good, maybe you could get it for your birthday?" Chris asked and Pj nodded again.
"Anyway," Pj said, sadly taking off the guitar and hanging it back up, gazing at it before turning back to them. "Where next?"
"Topman, I want a bag, mines pretty much broken," Chris said and they all nodded, walking out the shop, Pj trailing behind still staring at the guitar.


"Peej it's your birthday soon you can get it then okay?" Chris said when they got outside and he noticed Pj was looking a bit sad.
"Yeah I guess, I just don't know if I will or not it's really expensive," he said thoughtfully.
"Cheer up chuck, it will be fine," Chris told him, kissing his cheek and Pj gave him a small smile, taking his hand.
"So Chris, what did you do to need a new bag?" Phil asked and Chris opened his mouth but not sound came out. "That bad?" Phil laughed.
"No, I just might have hung it out the bathroom window on the 3rd floor and it might have fallen into the thorn bushes underneath and I might have ripped it when I was getting it out," Chris said, going red because of his stupid he felt.
"Smooth," Phil said bluntly and Pj laughed loudly.
"I didn't mean to drop it!" He protested and Phil and Pj laughed again.
"Sure you didn't," Pj said sarcastically.
"Fine take his side," Chris moaned, folding his arms and letting go of Pj's hand, walking ahead of then towards topshop.
"Crab," Pj called sweetly, walking quicker to Chris and sliding his arm around his shoulders and he slowed down a little. "You did bring it on yourself and it was a funny story, I wasn't being mean," he said, resting his head on Chris's shoulder.
"Still," Chris pouted, but he slowly unfolded his arms and slid his hand around Pj's waist.
"And they award goes to Pj for getting Chris out of a strop so quickly," Phil said. "I mean seriously, it usually takes me lots of food and bribing," Phil said and Pj chuckled.
"I must be special then," he said. "He usually gets out of them quickly with me and it's been like that forever,"
"Yeah because I am in love with you and have been for the past 2 years, it's kinda hard to stay mad at someone you feel that way about," Chris told them.
"I love you, you know that right?" Pj told him and Chris smiled and blushed.
"You too,"


"Sometimes you guys are too sweet," Phil told them and they grinned at him. "It's like a unicorn is crying maypole syrup it's so sweet,"
"Shut up," Chris said, but they all laughed.


They walked up to topshop and started climbing the stairs. Phil suddenly felt his heart sink a little, and remembered the time he had come here with Dan. How he had carried him up the stairs because of his leg. He had been really sweet when they were together. He felt his phone buzz in his pocket and pulled it out as the climbed the stairs to topman. He pulled it out and smiled at his text from Damian. He had kinda forgotten about him while he had been out.


Are you okay sweet? I miss you xxx


I'm out with Chris and Pj which is quite fun :) are you okay too? Xxx


Damian didn't reply straight away so Phil shrugged and put it back in his pocket, looking back up and realising Chris and Pj had wandered over to the bags without him noticing. He walked past the jeans, smiling again as he remembered picking them out with Dan. And the girls, the girls who had helped him make Dan buy that ripped pair. He wondered if those two girls were still together. He looked up at Chris and Pj and blinked hard, but the two girls where there. They must not have come out with their friend this time, but they were laughing with Chris and Pj, holding hands proudly now, unlike before when the blonde one had to coax her girlfriend to. Phil walked over excitedly and they noticed him and beamed widely.


"Hello stranger," the blonde one said.
"Hey guys, how are you?" Phil asked.
"I'm good thanks," the brunette said.
"I wish I had asked for your names before, but as I stupidly didn't, what are they?" Phil asked, still smiling.
"Call me Ra, or Rach," the brunette said, smiling up at him.
"I'm Lisa," the blonde said. "But feel free to call me Lis,"
"That or sweetie," Ra told them.
"Oh shush your pretty little mouth," Lis replied.
"Well I'm Phil, and these are my friends Chris and Pj," Phil told them.
"Hey," they both said, then giggled. "You don't need us to convince anyone to buy any jeans this time right?" Ra said.
"No not this time," Phil told them.
"Oh, are you still with that boy?" Lis asked curiously.
"He's called Dan. And no I'm not," he said, frowning slightly.
"That's a shame, you too seemed really in love when we met you,"
"Yeah..." Phil said a little sadly. "And I take it you two are still together?" He half asked, smiling again. They raised their entwined hands and saluted, before dropping them.
"Yup. She's the Sherlock to my John," Lis said proudly.
"The Cas to my Dean,"
"The Amy to my Rory,"
"The River to my doctor,"
"I'm the doctor in that scenario," Lis said firmly and Ra narrowed her eyes at her, opening her mouth to disagree.


"Anyway, you guys being girls and good with advice and stuff, what bag do you think I should get?" Chris asked, holding up two.
"So you won't listen to my opinion but you will to theirs?" Pj said, rolling his eyes at him.
"Because you said that weird one was nice!" Chris said. "Anyway ladies would you do me the honour of helping me choose a good bag?"
"Certainly. Lissy, which backpack? And why?"
"Well one is pretty awesome and looks like it's from thingy, erm... Scott Pilgrim vs the world! That one. But the other is TARDIS blue... Hard choice really,"
"Almost impossible,"
"Highly improbable,"
"Can you guys just tell me please?" Chris said and they giggled.
"One day we will stop messing with people. The blue one," Lis said.
"Definitely," Ra agreed.
"Thank you ladies you are life savers," Chris told them and bowed low to them before walking off to the till.
"And that was Chris," Pj chuckled. "I'm surprised he didn't curtsy really,"
"Me too," Phil added.


"I think he's sweet," Lis said.
"I think he's hot," Ra added making them giggle.
"I think be careful as Pj here will fight you for him," Phil said and scowled at him, but then nodded.
"Yeah I probably would," he said and the girls laughed again.
"It's fine I am perfectly happy with my Lissy," Ra said and pecked her cheek making her blush.
"Well I'm happy with my pumpkin pasty," Lis said and kissed her cheek back.
"Okay Pj they are cuter than you and Chris I'm sorry," Phil told him and Pj laughed. Chris came back over and slung the bag onto his back happily. "Oh before we go can I get you guy's numbers?" Phil asked the girls.
"Sure," they both said and Phil passed Lis his phone, where she put in her number and then Ra did the same.
"Thanks," he said, smiling. "See you guys around okay?"


They waved goodbye and Chris, Phil and Pj walked down the stairs. Phil felt so happy, but something was nagging at the back of his mind. Had he really fallen out of love with Dan that quickly? He frowned and shook the thought from his head. He was with Damian now and he was happy, he shouldn't be thinking about Dan so much. But that was probably just the memories coming back or something.


"So lunch? Pizza? Like old times?" Chris asked.
"Yeah, that sounds great," Phil said and he smiled, remembering what it was like before Dan was in his life, how this used to be a monthly tradition between the three but for some reason they had stopped. It was good to have it back. Sometimes going back a little in time can make the present sparkle like yesterday.


They walked to the Pizza Hut around the corner and took a seat in the booth, not bothering to look at the menu. They always had the same thing, 3 cokes and a large pepperoni pizza to share.
They ordered and were chatting and laughing happily about school when Phil checked his phone for texts, Damian hadn't replied again. He frowned and put the phone back in his pocket and looked up to see Pj staring at him worriedly.


"Nothing from Damian?" Pj asked quietly and Phil sighed, then nodded.
"I'm guessing Dan told you," he said glumly and Pj and Chris smiled sadly.
"Yeah, and don't think we aren't fine with it, it really is, it's just really upsetting how sad Dan is," Chris said awkwardly.
"I know and I wish he wasn't so cut up about it I really want him to be happy again," Phil said sadly and Chris patted his shoulder.
"Maybe you could talk to him, be friends again with him at least?" Chris suggested.
"I don't know. I would love to be friends and normal with him but I don't think there ever was that between us. Like, I always felt I had a crush on him when I met him so we haven't actually been friends properly before. And after everything I don't know how he would react around me because of how he broke down before and I don't want that, because it hurt me too," Phil tried to explain.
"I get what you mean. But school, you are going to have to sit with him in lessons, it can't really be blocked out can it?" Pj asked again.
"Should I talk to him? Or should I just see what happens?" Phil wondered. "Because guys, I am really happy with Damian and I seriously don't know if I could ever truly forgive Dan for what he did, it really hurt me. And I don't know if I will be able to handle sitting next to him in classes, hell, I don't even know how I handled the fight between them. I honesty just wanted to sit and cry. Just what should I do I just..." Phil trailed off, running a hand messily through his head and resting his head in his hands. "Look, I loved Dan and he hurt me really bad. And now Damian is fixing me and yes, honestly, after seeing how torn up Dan was I would love to be able to make him fell happy again but I can't because he has just confused my feelings so much I don't know how to act around him if I ever am. And I think this time, i just have to put what makes me happy first, and I don't think that's him anymore."


"That's fine Phil. Do what you want if it makes you happy, as that's the really important thing," Pj told him, still looking sad because of Dan, but knowing it was the right thing for him to do.
"Thanks," Phil said and gave them a small smile. Chris didn't say anything and was chewing his lip but then the waitress appeared and suddenly he was grinning.
"Your pizza boys," she said, grinning at them.
"Thank you, you just made this meal 100 times more pretty," Chris told her and she blushed and smiled at him.
"Well aren't you too sweet for words?" She said, flashing him another grin before walking off. Looks like Chris was back.
"Do you always flirt with every waitress you encounter?" Phil chuckled and he shrugged, raising his eyebrows.
"It's a natural reaction I can't help it," he said and Phil laughed and Pj scowled, but he was smiling. Everything was back to normal and Phil was laughing with his 2 best friends. That was almost everyone he needed to be happy.



He hugged Chris and Pj goodbye when they got back to his house, Phil waving as they went into Chris's house and he turned around, starting to make his way home.
"Phil!" He heard Chris call after him when he was part way down the road. He turned around and Chris ran up to him in just his socks, looking worried but like he had just made an amazing discovery.
"Chris are you okay?" Phil asked, confused at what Chris was doing.
"I just want to ask you something. Don't ask questions just do it I want to help," Chris said honestly.
"Okay." Phil trusted Chris, even if he was a bit of an idiot, and would do what he said no matter what.
"Close your eyes," Chris instructed and Phil followed. "Now imagine sparks, fireworks, crackles of electricity. Got that?" Nod. "Now the feeling of having butterflies in your stomach and your heart flipping over. Okay, now tell me the first thing you think of when i ask you this question. Ready?" Phil nodded again.


"Who do you get this feeling with?" Chris asked. Silence, then Phil opened his eyes and stared blankly at Chris.


"See you soon Chris," he said, giving him and small smile and walking away, not looking back, keeping his eyes firmly open and hardly daring to think what his mind way whispering to him.


'You're all I see even with my eyes closed'




Okay guys lets play a small game called analyse the song lyric! (It's from Lucy Spraggen's song Let go btw) okay, forget about the whole feeling thing Chris did, but think about this. What do you do when you close your eyes? (Like love wise? And don't say sleep an if you get what I am saying I will be super happy)


That was actually incredibly smart of me I am gonna eat some chocolate for that as I am proud (woooo English!)


This chapter took longer then I wanted because this week I have been ill, rained on a lot and pretty blocked writing wise I hate most of this chapter to be honest but anyway I am getting really stressed with school as I have like no time at all for anything (maths exams on Monday and Wednesday and I have been getting d's the past few tests and I need to do well on these ones like seriously) and sixth form open day tomorrow and revision and yeah. I don't have much time to write but it's all confusing because I like writing as it makes me less stressed but I'm getting blocked and AHHHH it's so confusing.


Yeah... Life.


In other words I will still write when I can but I will just not be updating on a time scale. Alright? (Because like you have no choice in this if you want decent stuff)


Anyways (that was a bit depressing really sorry)


Stay fancy my French toast!


Anni out!


*drives up to your house in an impala playing high school musical loudly and tells you to get in loser and takes you shopping*


My radiator just made a really scary noise I think it is possessed...