Insecurities (Short story)

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A/N: This short story I have been writing for over a month. There is a trigger warning so please don't read if it will trigger you.

There is a character in this story named Alex and yes it is loosely based on them personality wise but not 100% so please don't yell at me because the Alex in this story goes by she/her unlike the real Alex. I did it so readers would picture a female because it is a gender neutral name.

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It was a test. A simple test. If only it was that. A test that drove people to the brink of insanity. This was the test that determined if you could live in society or not. If you failed, they publicly executed you to show that your parents failed the world. I was 16 which is the year you take the test. Nobody is allowed to speak of the test so I have no idea what to expect.

I enter the dark room. I see nothing. Terrified, I sat on the floor trying to see if the lights would turn on or not. I heard quiet whispers coming from all directions. "She's gonna fail..." "Look at her, she's weak....." "Even if she gets out she'll be too messed up to live in society.." "She's worthless" "She's stupid" etc. I covered my ears, crying.  I wanted to be quiet but their voices got louder and louder as they were screaming in my ears.

I stayed like that for what felt like hours before someone came. All at once the voices subsided. I was shaking and rocking back and forth when the city police pulled me out of the room. They asked me questions like "what's your name?" "what are you doing here?" and other things. I answered correctly and then told me I passed.

"That was a horrible test...making me hear those voices..." I told one of them while he was on his way out. He looked at a sheet of paper and up at me concerned. "There weren't any voices...you were in a room by yourself in the dark and that was it...Your biggest fear is being alone..." Before I could beg him not to tell, he rushed out of the room.

I panicked and tried to run off, but some men in the hallway grabbed me and I felt a  sharp pain in my neck. All at once my world became crooked and then.....darkness.

I woke up being dragged out to the town square. Thousands of men, women, and children standing there in awe with smiles on their faces. We had always been talked that the people unfit chose to be so and by making that choice, they deserved what they got. 

I was the only one scheduled to be executed that day because you take the test on your actual birthday. The police began to tie me to a wooden stake. I didn't bother fighting back because it would be the whole town against me. There was no way I could win.

They finished tying me up when the head of guards, Rufus, smirked wildly. "I'm gonna enjoy blowing that pretty little head of yours off your shoulders......such a shame to let such a good body go to waste.." I felt him pinch my ass as he loaded the gun. Rufus was about 25, or something. The laws say that it doesn't matter who you married but the older one in the relationship must pay the family for the younger's hand in marriage. Same sex marriage is allowed.

Rufus wasn't married yet though. When he wasn't spending his days blowing off "Insecurities" heads, (That's what they call those of us who aren't fit for society, because we make the government insecure about the safety of the country) Rufus gets drunk at the pub and has sex with one of the random sluts.

Our country came to this after the wars that began when a man named Donald Trump became president. The remaining countries took refugee in the spare land and agreed never to interfere with the other countries. Those who travel the world are not allowed to speak of where they came from or what they've seen. The world is secluded.

Rufus  loaded his pistol and smiled. I looked into the faces of all the people waiting for my life to be over. I refused to be scared. I welcomed death long ago when I became depressed. The faces in the crowd  irritated me. How could they think this was okay?! How could they stand and watch me leave this world?!

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