Promise

Chapter 32 - before we met

I slowly made my way from the couch to the bedroom door. Louis had made me some tea after I had stopped crying and Niall was also back on the bus. He asked us why we were so tensed so I just told him that Harry and I had an argument.

I turned around to look at them again. Louis gave me and encouraging nod and Niall gave me a thumbs up and a smile. I gave them the best smile I had which actually wasn't much. I nodded at them before I anxiously knocked on the door.

He didn't respond so I just opened the door. It was also my bedroom after all, so I had all the right to go in there. The light was off and the lamp from the nightstand lied broken on the floor just before my feet. I stepped over it and stopped just before the bed. I stood there and looked at him. My eyes were drawn to his bared torso immediately.

His tanned chest rose slowly as he breathed and his eyes were focussed on the ceiling. He looked serene but also furiating. He didn't react to the fact that I had enterred the room. He kept lying on the bed, not moving. 

The grey jogging shorts he was wearing were actually mine but they looked so much better on him. He looked extraordinary handsome in this dimmed light. Even more than he ever has. 

No.

I had to focus now. He was beautiful. He was beyond perfect. I knew that. Everyone knew it, he knew it himself of course. He does have that much conceit to think of himself that way. 

I cleared my throat. His focus on the ceiling changed to a focus on something on the floor next to the bed. He still wasn't acknowledging my presence. He bent down over the edge of te bed to grab something. I couldn't see what it was until his iPhone lit up. A picture of me was shown on his lockscreen. I haven't even seen it before. It was a picture of me sitting on the concrete alongside the road with a guitar. A flower crown in my hair and only wearing denim shorts and a loose cropped shirt. 

He was staring at it before he swiped his phone to unlock it. He sat up and leaned against the wall. Then he finally looked up at me and stared at me. He padded the bed next to him, gesturing me to sit down next him. I hesitated for a second but thought that it was for the best. We needed to talk.

Once I sat down next to him he handed me his phone. I looked at him first but he nodded for me to take it. I took it and looked at the picture that was displaying. When I realised what it was I wanted to hand the phone back to him but he took my hand and stopped me from returning it.

"No. Look at it and hate me for it. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have done it. But.. It was just.. I don't even know what I was thinking. I want you to know that I'm really not like that. You wouldn't believe it because I have proven to you that I am like that. And I totally understand you if you're leaving me and I would even understand if you never want to talk to me again, but I don't want you to do that." he looked up and stared me in the eyes. Even in this darkness I could still see the brightness that was always there in his deep green eyes.

His hand, still on my hand started fiddling with my fingers and I didn't protest. Because I also didn't want myself to do that. I won't ever leave him. 

"I really don't want you to leave. I want you to stay with me, here. With us. And I also want you to stay with me even when you go back to school. After the summer." he said and his voice cracked a little.

"But I thou-.." 

"Yeah, I know what you thought. You heard me talk to Louis. I know that. But I take everything back. The last few weeks with you have been better than every single day in my life without you. Even if you can't be around all the time, you can still be around like you were before.. Before all this shit." he said pointing to the lamp on the floor. But he didn't meant that, he wanted to say the accident.