Not Your Average Cheerleader

NYAC - Part 21

I panicked and placed my fingers in front of his lips, getting him to stop. My heart was racing and this sudden feeling of Anxiety was starting to overwhelm my body. I looked at Dan, Ashamed of what I did and got up from the blankets that surrounded the fire, starting to walk away from him. I walked into the darkness and sighed, exhaling all breath that I had pent up silently. A slight chill started to crawl through my shoulders, The warmth of the fire really was making a difference. I kept walking until I reached a hill close by, taking a seat where I pulled my knees up and rested my chin against them whilst my arms were wrapped around my legs. I stayed like this, quietly watching the stars and the moon fill the night sky without saying a world, I knew I was being stupid, but there was an alarm ticking in my brain saying "No don't do it"

I could hear someone trampling the grass behind me, the steps slowly getting closer and closer. Dan took a seat next to me and continued to glance at me, I didn't look at him though, I was too afraid at the moment, not of him, but where it was going.

"What the hell was that?"

I sighed and tilted my head away from him. Normally people didn't react this way and I knew Dan wasn't one to be rejected so I knew he was just as confused as I was. I closed my eyes and took a breath before falling back into the grass and watching the stars above.

"I'm sorry"

"About?"

"I just. I can't"

"You can't what? Kiss me?"

I didn't give him an answer, I simply just watched all the stars dance in the sky. Dan sighed, it sounded impatient, but I couldn't help how I was feeling.

"Alright, well I'm going to pack everything up"

He got up from beside me and started muttering with each step he started to take away from me, not knowing that with every step he was taking, I was getting closer and closer to tears. I closed my eyes and tried to continue breathing, but when I felt a single tear run down the side of my face. I knew it was game over. I started to suck on my bottom lip so that it couldn't be heard, but the build up of pent emotions was drilling its way through me. I sat back up and rubbed my arms, trying to keep myself warm as I silently sobbed. After a while Dan came back up and looked down at me.

"I don't get you"

I sniffled and then looked up at him with my glossy eyes, trying to subtly wipe away the tears.

"What?"

"I don't get you, One minute it's like you show interest in me, the next you're either cock-blocking me or leaving me in a friend zone. What is it? People don't just reject me like that, are you playing me? Is that was this is? For the years of torment you decided to get back at me by making me feel for you? If that's the case (Y/n), that's a little fucked up."

"That's not it Dan."

"THEN WHAT IS IT?!"

"I'VE NEVER BEEN KISSED BEFORE"

I got up from the ground and practically yelled it in his face, tears down my face and most likely looking like a mess. I felt like such an idiot to say it, but it was honestly the truth. I had never been kissed before, I've never had a boyfriend or had sex before. I was considered a weirdo for it. Normally people my age did all this stuff, but no one ever liked me enough to wanna do these things with me, and it made me feel like there was something wrong with me all this time. I turned around and wiped my tears again before looking back to the stars.

"Please just take me home"

"(Y/n) I..."

"Just.. Take me home Dan, please."

He sighed and simply nodded, taking me back over to his truck, I got into the passenger's seat and waited whilst Dan finished putting the last few things away before he got in himself to drive me home. He put the keys into the ignition and turned on the truck. For a while we drove in silence, my arm was rested against the window and I stared out into the darkness. all I could feel between us was tension. I knew it was my fault but I couldn't let him kiss me like it was a simple thing to do, it wasn't simple for me, the very thought made my chest tighten with nervous feelings. Dan sighed again and then glanced at me.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know"

"It doesn't matter Dan"

"Why is this so hard for you. I don't get it, once again"

"Because this whole time I've felt like something was wrong with me, nobody wants me."

"Then what the fuck is Hayden doing if he isn't into you?"

"What does Hayden have to do with this?"

"You said no one was into you"

"Hayden is besides the point, Hayden's an asshole jock that needs a slap up the head."

Dan looked at me, slightly enraged. Maybe I said something wrong at this point.

"Well then what the fuck am I?"

I couldn't give him an answer. the next thing that happened was a horn screaming with a sudden crash. And then everything went black.