Fake your death

In which he realises

Self harm trigger warning

Gerard's pov
I lay in bed, my eyes trained on the tiny, barred window. Stars hung in the sky like silver tears and the moon was blindingly bright. I clenched my eyes shut and sighed, deep sadness filling me. I couldn't control it. My heart felt like it was only half of what it could be, and I felt like soon it would become whole. The sadness, though, was the fact that I realised why. Why I only had half a heart. I needed someone to love me.

But who could love a lunatic like me? Who? I wrench the covers off my body and swing my legs over the edge of the bed, ignoring the tingle of apprehensive fear I always get with the monster beneath the bed. As I pad across the cold laminate floor of room I repeat the words I my head 'you are an ugly, worthless freak. Nobody will ever love you. You are an...' again and again until the burning behind my eyes was forced through my tear ducts. I sob. Falling to the ground, I stare in agony at my bare surroundings.

I had only made it to the door of the bathroom. I stared at the wooden painted door, a faint smile forming on my tear stained face. I sniffle, wiping my nose on my sleeve. The grin on my face extending until it felt like my face split in two. As I formulate the plan in my head, I chuckle at the simplicity of it. Relief. All the pain, gone. I stumble over to the wooden door and open it with shaking hands, still laughing. I put my headi between the door and the frame, and pull the door out as far as my arm an reach.

I slam it again and again until I am too weak to push it anymore. Blood pools around my knees on the floor and matts my hair. Deep welds cover both sides of my face. As I drift in and out of consciousness, I see a shadow at the window. I think I know who it is, and if I it is, I -----GAHH!!!!! In pure agony, I lift my hands to my head as stars explode behind my eyes. I yell out in shock and the light flicks on in my room, blinding me.
"Oh, shit..." I hear Patrick say, "gee, what the fuck?" Suddenly, knowing I disappointed him sends me over the edge. I try to look at him through tears, stars and partial blindness, and seeing his horrified face makes me snap.

Patrick pov
He Laughs. Laughs and laughs, whilst i stare at him in disbelief. He raises up his hand and twists it into his hair. His hair is something he always hated about himself, and seeing his hand entwined in it suddenly fills me with dread. He pulls his hand down sharply, tearing his hair away from his head. He does it again and again until I dive over and restrain his hands, whilst calling for Hayley and pete. Soon, gee gives into me, his struggles slowing to a halt. I take this as a chance to examine him. Blood coats his small frame and I notice the door has blood on it.

Gee, what have you done?