Stuck in the Clouds

He's Still Mine?

Evelyn’s POV

          It’s been six months. 180 days and 3 hours to be exact. Since Rudy walked out that door and I haven’t seen him since. I haven’t heard from him either. But, that is my fault. I was the one who told him that I didn’t know what I wanted. Did I hurt him? Yes I did. Is that what I wanted? No it wasn’t but there was nothing I could do about it now. Today was his birthday. June 17th. Can you believe it? Rudy has finally turned 18.

          Now if we end this he can be free. He won’t have to hold on to me anymore. If he comes today then I will know. I will know for sure that he doesn’t want me. I didn’t want to see or hear from him today. It would only devastate me. It’s not like he knew where I lived anyway.         

          A couple things have changed in these small months that have passed by. It may seem like a short part of time but it was pure torture without Rudy. I tried so hard to forget about him, but I can’t. I knew that I wanted him. When I told him that I wasn’t sure I was lying to him. I did want him. I just couldn’t tell him that I did. Why? Well I wasn’t even sure. I still am not sure.

          I moved out of the dorm that he rented for me. I told the University to let the owner know that I am done with it, and that I won’t be using it for anything anymore. I also kept my working up and got rid of my old phone. I canceled the plan that I had with him and began a new one. I continued working and thank god I had a full scholarship otherwise I would have dropped out. I know that it sounded weird to do all these things, but I needed independence. I needed to prove that I could do all these things on my own. Since I was married, I was practically treated like I was 18, so that was one upside to this whole thing.

          I nibbled a little on the sandwich I had in front of me in my normal sized dorm. It was small, but I had worked for it so it made me feel really accomplished. I heard someone knocking on the door and got up to open it. I wasn’t expecting anyone, but I never was.

          I calmed down when I saw Jake smiling at the door. “Come on in Jake.” I said. He still had that habit of not coming in unless he was invited.

          He took a seat on my bed and looked at me, “Any news?” I knew what he was talking about but I didn’t want to get straight to it so I beat around the bush a little.

          “About what?” I said trying to hide my face so he doesn’t read my expression.

          I could hear Jake sigh before continuing, “Did you at least wish him a happy birthday. After all, he does deserve at least that.”

          “No! Of coarse I didn’t are you insane?” I said meeting Jakes eyes again, “I could never do that besides his number is not in my contacts.” I pointed out.

          “Doesn’t mean it’s not in your memory Evelyn. I know you know it. And you know how much I don’t like the idea of you not talking to him. He came all the way here six months ago and you let him slip away.” Jake lectured me. I stayed quiet and waited for him to finish what he had to say.

          “Are you done lecturing?” I asked him when he finished his last sentence.

          “Was I doing that again?” Jake asked with a smile brightening up his face again.

          “Yes.” I replied playfully. Jake was the only friend that I made and kept at this university. There were a lot of people that seemed really nice. But that was on the outside. I can’t trust anyone anymore. Except Jake of coarse who couldn’t trust him. “Have you seen Albert anywhere?” I asked Jake.